"The notion that such persons are gay of heart and carefree is curiously untrue. They lead, as a matter of fact, an existence of jumpiness and apprehension. They sit on the edge of the chair of Literature. In the house of Life they have the feeling that they have never taken off their overcoats."
- James Thurber, My Life and Hard Times

Wednesday, September 7, 2011

If I can't just request it, I'll bribe you for it

I consider myself a fairly nice person, but I'm also an impatient one. It is one of the qualities my P.I., Peri Minneopa and I share. So in the previous post, I asked for some input on what to call my second humor book. There were no answers. So I tried posing a Question on Facebook. I got three responses. Three is not enough, people.

So now I'm going to do what any author in their right mind, or at least right brain, would do: offer a prize.

Here's what I'll do. Help me come up with a title and you'll get a free book.

The rules are as follows:

1. The contest will be open for 1 (one, uno, un) week.
2. During that week, you can either vote for one of the titles listed below, or submit your own brilliant idea in the Comments.
3. If I get a bunch of votes for a title, everyone who voted will get a free copy.
4. If someone submits something so amazingly brilliant I wish I'd have thought of it, that person gets a free copy AND a mention in the Acknowledgments.

Are you willing to help me now?

(Rough draft) Synopsis: When Gayle Carline got a job writing a humor column for her local newspaper, she knew it would be a fun assignment. What she didn't know is that her son would begin every conversation with, "This is off the record." But that didn't stop her. Join her continuing journey of balancing her life as a wife, mother, and occasional juggler of 1000-lb horses with writing a column about her husband, son, and everyday events. Her husband and son may object from time to time, but the horses don't complain.

Possible titles:

1. I'd Like to be Self-Absorbed But I Don't Have the Time

2. In My Spare Time, I Juggle Horses

3. In My Spare Time - Wait, I Don't Have Any

4. Wolves Mate for Life Because They Don't Speak English

5. Fodder for Thought (volunteered by Chrissie Barnett)

6. Two Years Before the Masthead (Okay, I know this one is too erudite, but it still makes me laugh)

Let the voting/suggestions begin!


Jen Eldridge said...

Here are a few:
"A Horse of different story"
"Hold your Horses"
"The Gift Horse"
"The Art before the Horse"
"The Dark Horse Chronicles"
"Now Hold your Horses..."
""Behold, a White Horse"
"Straight from the Horses Mouth.."
"Off the record..."
"A little knowledge is a dangerous thing.."
"A begining makes an ending.."
"Wild horses in my living room.."

Following you on Twitter (jeneldridge1)

Will send more when I think of them....

Jen Eldridge said...

Just few more...
"According to Carline (or Gee)"
""For Whom Gayle Tolls (or toils)"
"Just a click away..."
"The Writing Muse"
"I'm just sayin...."

OK now I'll stop...JE

Gayle Carline said...

HA HA HA JEN - Stop, you're killing me!

MissedCongeniality said...

"Get this book now, dammit"
"Billionaire Secrets"
"Don't Be What You See" with a pic of a horses behind
"Just Enough to be Dangerous"
"Thundering Herd"

Unknown said...

Okay, how about
"Between Balancing Acts and Juggling Horses"

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