"The notion that such persons are gay of heart and carefree is curiously untrue. They lead, as a matter of fact, an existence of jumpiness and apprehension. They sit on the edge of the chair of Literature. In the house of Life they have the feeling that they have never taken off their overcoats."
- James Thurber, My Life and Hard Times

Thursday, October 20, 2011

We have a winner!

First of all, to keep this post even mildly related to October and All Hallows Eve and Dias de los Muertos and all things macabre and chilling, I've had a few fun Halloween costumes, but there's one I've always wanted to wear. You could say it's on my bucket list, to dress like Carmen Miranda.

Isn't she fabulous? Check out the shoes - who wouldn't want to dress up like her? There are only two problems. One is I don't have the time, or possibly the ability to MAKE a costume like this, and I don't know where I'd rent one. The other is, at my age, I don't have the abs to make it fab. But if given the opportunity, I'd make it work.

Maybe I should just stick with this one. I could probably whip up an adult-sized version of this without too much trouble. (In case you don't know, I'm a horse. My Aunt Ardell made this for me, and was my idol forever after.)

Now then, to more pressing, non-scary matters:


Remember last month when I was trying to goad you all into helping me chose a name for my next humor book? Remember the rules, where you could vote for one, or come up with a new one, and that I'd either pick the one with the most votes or the suggestion that was so freakin' brilliant it made every other title hide in shame?

That last thing happened. A title was submitted that was P.E.R.F.E.C.T. Perfect, I tell you. When I turned it in to Joe Felipe, my cover designer, he designed the P.E.R.F.E.C.T. cover for it. It's kErma, I tell you. Karmic Erma.

Ta Da!

Title submitted by Tameri Etherton, who will receive a free, autographed copy.


When Gayle Carline clawed her way into her local newspaper office and groveled until they gave her a weekly humor column, she worried about not having enough material. Then she took a look at her life. Nearly every week something in her house or car needs repair, her son doesn't know why being able to see his carpet is a big deal, and her husband believes less is more, especially when it comes to communication. In What Would Erma Do, she chronicled her first two years as a paid exaggerator. Now she's back with two more years of merriment, along with editorial high jinks and readers' opinions. It's the most fun she's ever had without a credit card.

Quotes from World Famous Reviewers: 
"This is off the record, right, Mom?" - Marcus Carline

"When I retire, I'm writing some rebuttals." - Dale Carline
Are You There Erma? It's Me, Gayle will be released within the next two weeks (I still want to give it one more read-through). As always, it will be available as a paperback for $12.99, as well as an e-reader through Kindle, Nook, Sony, Apple, Kobo, you name it, I'll sell it there for the low-low price of 99 cents.
I'll, of course, announce its availability on Facebook, Twitter, and the 6 o'clock news, if I can figure out a way to get their attention without being arrested. But if you want to just be told, ship me your email and you'll be the first to receive the announcement. I promise, PROMISE, not to email you anything else, unless you request it.

1 comment:

Tameri Etherton said...

You'd make an amazing Carmen! I think you should go for it. Those shoes do terrify me, though. Could you walk in those, or would we need to prop you up? Perhaps put you on a dolly and wheel you around. It would be bedazzled, of course.

Hey! Glad you liked my title choice. It did seem rather perfect. I can't believe I'm going to get a signed copy of your book. Whooohoooo! I'm so excited!

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