Funny thing happened at the Placentia Heritage Day Festival on Saturday. I made up a nice sign to direct people to drop their business cards in a bowl for a chance at winning one of my fabulous prizes. I have several of those plastic holders to set on a table and hold signs, so I packed one for the sign with the prices on it and one with the "Don't Just Stand There, Win Something" sign.
When I unpacked at the park... one of the plastic holders was broken. Annihilated. Unfixable.
So I didn't put out the Win Something sign and I didn't give anything away.
Damn.
But their loss is possibly your gain. I'm giving away Hit or Missus items today. I have one tote bag and two mugs, all of which have the cover art and the slogan, "A friend will help you move. A good friend will help you move a body."
All you have to do is share with me. You can do it in the comments below, or on Facebook or Twitter or Google Plus. Give me one story of how far you've gone to help a friend.
I'll choose three winners, based on either the sweetness or outlandishness of the deed.
Ready, set, go!
"The notion that such persons are gay of heart and carefree is curiously untrue. They lead, as a matter of fact, an existence of jumpiness and apprehension. They sit on the edge of the chair of Literature. In the house of Life they have the feeling that they have never taken off their overcoats."
- James Thurber, My Life and Hard Times
- James Thurber, My Life and Hard Times
Showing posts with label hit or missus. Show all posts
Showing posts with label hit or missus. Show all posts
Wednesday, October 16, 2013
Monday, April 15, 2013
I hope, and I hope you hope, too
I'm writing this at 9 p.m. on Monday night, the last night of my Kindle giveaway. My goal was 20,000 downloads, which would be about 15,000 more than any other giveaway. I've been told that these kinds of numbers give Hit or Missus a better shot at staying high enough on the free list to stay on readers' radar when it goes back on sale.
There are three hours to go and I've gotten over 30,000 downloads.
I'd like to revel in this and do a little victory lap, except that the news out of Boston today makes every little joy or sorrow seem pale and empty. So much sadness and chaos and destruction. As far as I know, we still don't know who is responsible for this horror. We don't have a final count of the dead and the wounded. We don't even know what we don't know.
Part of me wants to sink down under the covers and wait for it to be over. Part of me wants to wander from person to person and hug and weep. And part of me wants to pump some sunshine into my heart and rise up to defeat the tragedy.
As usual, music comes to my rescue. It calms me, it lifts me, it reminds me that for every useless piece of crap who enjoys cruelty, there are artists who write brilliant words and music and want the world to be better not worse.
I picked out some videos today of songs that make me feel stronger, and thought I'd share them to make you feel stronger, too. I don't want to be stronger alone.
First is the Carpenters' Rainy Days and Mondays. Karen's voice is so beautiful, and even though this is a bit of a subdued, even sad, song but there's hope hidden inside. What makes it more poignant to me is to know how Karen must have identified with the words.
Instead of a rainy day, I'd rather have a Chelsea morning, especially as described by Joni. I love when the "sun poured in like butterscotch and stuck to all my senses."
Next is Ain't No Mountain High Enough. Yes, it's a love song, but shouldn't it apply to us as friends and family and neighbors and communities?
The Age of Aquarius is from the musical Hair, written in 1969. I was a teenager, hoping that we would make a difference, planning our world of peace, harmony, and understanding. I'm still planning.
Finally, I don't need to explain this one at all. I hope.
Can you hope with me?
There are three hours to go and I've gotten over 30,000 downloads.
I'd like to revel in this and do a little victory lap, except that the news out of Boston today makes every little joy or sorrow seem pale and empty. So much sadness and chaos and destruction. As far as I know, we still don't know who is responsible for this horror. We don't have a final count of the dead and the wounded. We don't even know what we don't know.
Part of me wants to sink down under the covers and wait for it to be over. Part of me wants to wander from person to person and hug and weep. And part of me wants to pump some sunshine into my heart and rise up to defeat the tragedy.
As usual, music comes to my rescue. It calms me, it lifts me, it reminds me that for every useless piece of crap who enjoys cruelty, there are artists who write brilliant words and music and want the world to be better not worse.
I picked out some videos today of songs that make me feel stronger, and thought I'd share them to make you feel stronger, too. I don't want to be stronger alone.
First is the Carpenters' Rainy Days and Mondays. Karen's voice is so beautiful, and even though this is a bit of a subdued, even sad, song but there's hope hidden inside. What makes it more poignant to me is to know how Karen must have identified with the words.
Instead of a rainy day, I'd rather have a Chelsea morning, especially as described by Joni. I love when the "sun poured in like butterscotch and stuck to all my senses."
Next is Ain't No Mountain High Enough. Yes, it's a love song, but shouldn't it apply to us as friends and family and neighbors and communities?
The Age of Aquarius is from the musical Hair, written in 1969. I was a teenager, hoping that we would make a difference, planning our world of peace, harmony, and understanding. I'm still planning.
Finally, I don't need to explain this one at all. I hope.
Can you hope with me?
Friday, April 12, 2013
Reaching for the stars
My sales of Hit or Missus are looking kind of saggy, so I'm doing another promotion this weekend to see if I can generate some interest. Quite frankly, the last promo of Freezer Burn was less than stellar, but in hindsight, I don't think I did enough promoting. I didn't let Ereader News Today know about it, I didn't mention it more than once in my social media, and I let opportunities slip by right and left at Left Coast Crime.
Mea uber-culpa.
So this weekend, I'm all in. I've alerted ENT, I've paid for a BookBub spot, I'll mention it in my social media circles once every day of the promotion, and-and-and- oh, yeah, I'm talking about it here.
Here's my goal: I want 20,000 downloads. If you have a Kindle or a Kindle app and don't have Hit or Missus, here is your opportunity to get a free book and help me reach my goal. I'm not asking for your money, just your mouse-clicks.
This Saturday through Monday, the ebook is available for free. Call it my gift to those of you who sweated and struggled to make the April 15th Tax Filing Day Deadline. The IRS has your money - let me give you something to cheer you up.
Thank you all so much for your support. I appreciate you.
Here's the link again. Remember, it's Saturday through Monday.
http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00537SP5M
Mea uber-culpa.
So this weekend, I'm all in. I've alerted ENT, I've paid for a BookBub spot, I'll mention it in my social media circles once every day of the promotion, and-and-and- oh, yeah, I'm talking about it here.
Here's my goal: I want 20,000 downloads. If you have a Kindle or a Kindle app and don't have Hit or Missus, here is your opportunity to get a free book and help me reach my goal. I'm not asking for your money, just your mouse-clicks.
This Saturday through Monday, the ebook is available for free. Call it my gift to those of you who sweated and struggled to make the April 15th Tax Filing Day Deadline. The IRS has your money - let me give you something to cheer you up.
Thank you all so much for your support. I appreciate you.
Here's the link again. Remember, it's Saturday through Monday.
http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00537SP5M
Monday, March 18, 2013
The trouble with trailers
I haven't posted anything recently, due to the fact that I've been insanely preoccupied with everything from getting my tax info together (something I vow to keep up with all year, but abandon by June), to working with the kids in the riding academy, to stressing over the reception for my son's recital.
I've also been musing, ruminating, noodling over a problem. It's not just my own problem, it belongs to a lot of authors, I think.
What do we do with book trailers?
Let me begin by saying that I think books should embrace all media. As our electronic age opens more doors, books have a wonderful advantage. You can sit down with a physical thing and feel the paper as you turn the pages and smell the ink and the glue from the binding and get lost in the words. Or you can press a button on a slim device and conjure up a story that comes with hyperlinks to pictures of things you've never seen and maybe even music playing in the background, and you can still get lost in the words.
I keep thinking book trailers will find their niche in the advertising scheme of things. They're out there, I know. My friends make them for their books. I even have friends who make trailers for other people's books. James Patterson gets his trailers on network TV, usually during episodes of Castle.
Like he needs more readers.
There needs to be a place for trailers to go, apart from YouTube and the author's website, etc. Some ideas I've had:
- A Book Trailer Channel. Twenty-four hours a day, nothing but trailers.
- A feature on trailers on NPR or other sites or TV channels that feature book reviews.
- Access to trailers for bookstores, either brick-and-mortar or internet, so they can display them on monitors in a store or in the corner of their website banner.
Got any other ideas? Maybe we could put our heads together and come up with a plan.
In the meantime, here are my three, promoting my Peri Minneopa Mystery Series:
FREEZER BURN:
HIT OR MISSUS:
THE HOT MESS:
I've also been musing, ruminating, noodling over a problem. It's not just my own problem, it belongs to a lot of authors, I think.
What do we do with book trailers?
Let me begin by saying that I think books should embrace all media. As our electronic age opens more doors, books have a wonderful advantage. You can sit down with a physical thing and feel the paper as you turn the pages and smell the ink and the glue from the binding and get lost in the words. Or you can press a button on a slim device and conjure up a story that comes with hyperlinks to pictures of things you've never seen and maybe even music playing in the background, and you can still get lost in the words.
I keep thinking book trailers will find their niche in the advertising scheme of things. They're out there, I know. My friends make them for their books. I even have friends who make trailers for other people's books. James Patterson gets his trailers on network TV, usually during episodes of Castle.
Like he needs more readers.
There needs to be a place for trailers to go, apart from YouTube and the author's website, etc. Some ideas I've had:
- A Book Trailer Channel. Twenty-four hours a day, nothing but trailers.
- A feature on trailers on NPR or other sites or TV channels that feature book reviews.
- Access to trailers for bookstores, either brick-and-mortar or internet, so they can display them on monitors in a store or in the corner of their website banner.
Got any other ideas? Maybe we could put our heads together and come up with a plan.
In the meantime, here are my three, promoting my Peri Minneopa Mystery Series:
FREEZER BURN:
HIT OR MISSUS:
THE HOT MESS:
Wednesday, January 9, 2013
Back to business
As anxious as I am to move on to the next book, The Hot Mess still deserves my attention. I like this book a lot, which I know sounds silly from an author. We're supposed to love all our books, the way we love all our children. (Okay, since I only have one child, that's pretty easy for me.) But we love our children differently.
I loved Freezer Burn because it was my first mystery novel and I was able to tell the story with a fun cast of characters and a plot that wasn't too full of holes. The whole thing was joyful. I especially loved the references to 40s film stars.
Hit or Missus was a difficult child, but I love it because it's more complex than Freezer Burn. I love the chick-lit elements of fashion and the elbow-rubbing Peri gets to do with the richer side of the Placentia tracks. Oddly, I hadn't planned to bring Benny Needles into this story, but my readers begged for him, so I relented. I'm glad I did. I enjoy him in this, as the little needy man who seems inept, until he displays some unknown talent that makes him indispensable.
The Hot Mess began as just the third story. It had possibilities. I planned to burn Benny's house down, put a body inside for good measure, and see how he melted down. What I ended up with was a story about people and families and secrets and tragedies and I love it. I love Peri and Benny's relationship in this. I love learning so much about their respective families. I love it that Skip and Peri have an active and exciting love life.
As with all my other books, I'm doing a giveaway via Goodreads. You've got until January 20th to enter. I chose that date because, well, it seemed like a good idea at the time. The bad news is that I'm only opening this contest to US residents. I'm sorry, I know I'm being selfish, but the last time I opened the contest to US, Canada, Australia, and the UK. Most of the winners were from Canada and Australia. This not only cost me extra $$ in terms of postage, but Canada's mail system was on strike at the time, so the US was not mailing anything to Canada until it was resolved. It took me weeks to get the darned books sent.
Here's the link to enter: http://www.goodreads.com/book/show/16249116-the-hot-mess.
I hope you win.
I loved Freezer Burn because it was my first mystery novel and I was able to tell the story with a fun cast of characters and a plot that wasn't too full of holes. The whole thing was joyful. I especially loved the references to 40s film stars.
Hit or Missus was a difficult child, but I love it because it's more complex than Freezer Burn. I love the chick-lit elements of fashion and the elbow-rubbing Peri gets to do with the richer side of the Placentia tracks. Oddly, I hadn't planned to bring Benny Needles into this story, but my readers begged for him, so I relented. I'm glad I did. I enjoy him in this, as the little needy man who seems inept, until he displays some unknown talent that makes him indispensable.
The Hot Mess began as just the third story. It had possibilities. I planned to burn Benny's house down, put a body inside for good measure, and see how he melted down. What I ended up with was a story about people and families and secrets and tragedies and I love it. I love Peri and Benny's relationship in this. I love learning so much about their respective families. I love it that Skip and Peri have an active and exciting love life.
As with all my other books, I'm doing a giveaway via Goodreads. You've got until January 20th to enter. I chose that date because, well, it seemed like a good idea at the time. The bad news is that I'm only opening this contest to US residents. I'm sorry, I know I'm being selfish, but the last time I opened the contest to US, Canada, Australia, and the UK. Most of the winners were from Canada and Australia. This not only cost me extra $$ in terms of postage, but Canada's mail system was on strike at the time, so the US was not mailing anything to Canada until it was resolved. It took me weeks to get the darned books sent.
Here's the link to enter: http://www.goodreads.com/book/show/16249116-the-hot-mess.
I hope you win.
Friday, October 19, 2012
The silence of the blogs
No, I'm not talking about this guy.
I mean, my blog has been very hit or miss (BUY HIT OR MISSUS - sorry, couldn't resist a subconscious plug there) because I am working on two books, one being edited for publication and one being written, not to mention the several that are swirling on the back burner, waiting to be started.
In one sense, I do identify with Mr. Lector - figuratively. I do see myself being hogtied and masked from normal communications in order to complete my tasks. The writing doesn't do itself, kids.
So until I'm back, thought I'd leave you with some music.
I love this theme because it encompasses different types of music, which to me, echoes the movie's theme of the pioneering spirits who pushed into the West, a big, sprawling tapestry of land and climate and challenges. Makes me want to create a soundtrack for my books.
But I have to stay focused. Write, write, write.
I mean, my blog has been very hit or miss (BUY HIT OR MISSUS - sorry, couldn't resist a subconscious plug there) because I am working on two books, one being edited for publication and one being written, not to mention the several that are swirling on the back burner, waiting to be started.
In one sense, I do identify with Mr. Lector - figuratively. I do see myself being hogtied and masked from normal communications in order to complete my tasks. The writing doesn't do itself, kids.
So until I'm back, thought I'd leave you with some music.
I love this theme because it encompasses different types of music, which to me, echoes the movie's theme of the pioneering spirits who pushed into the West, a big, sprawling tapestry of land and climate and challenges. Makes me want to create a soundtrack for my books.
But I have to stay focused. Write, write, write.
Friday, July 6, 2012
A weekend assignment for my Peeps
I'm on the backstretch, so to speak, of finishing the third Peri mystery. The threads I've unraveled and strewn about the first two-thirds of the book are now being gathered and knitted together. This morning I'm going to do a little recon in my neighborhood so I can write the final showdown as realistically as imagination will allow.
Recently, I made a comment on Jenny Hilborne's post in the Crime Fiction Collective about my books having "roots." There's always a core subject from which the plot and subplots grow. In Freezer Burn, it was about having children and being a mother. Peri's investigation leads her to women who have had children out of wedlock, and she thinks she might be pregnant. In Hit or Missus, it's all about friendships and what we're willing to do for people we love, people we are not related to. In both, I tried to lay down the root without bias. You're free to decide for yourself whether you want to have a child, kill for a friend, etc.
This new book will need a little more editing than the first two, not in terms of line-edits, but in content. As I get closer to the finish, I see more clearly what the book's roots are, and I know I will need to go in and strengthen a few of the scenes. I also know not to do this for at least 3-4 weeks. It's weird, but I know from experience that if I go back and edit too soon, the book gets all muddled, kind of like over-mixing the bread batter.
I've got plenty of other projects to distract me, but I'm missing something from the new book that I already had with the first two: a title.
The working title is Burning Mad, but I don't really like it. Your mission, should you accept it, is to suggest some alternatives. Here are the highlights (no, I don't have a blurb or a logline yet):
1. The main plot revolves around Benny Needles' house burning (almost) down. There is, of course, a body discovered. Benny hires Peri to investigate why his house burned, why someone was in his house, and why the insurance company won't pay up and people are suing him for wrongful death.
2. The root of the story is about families and how we survive them. The Debussy family is having problems with their son, Benny is refusing to talk about his dad, Peri is trying to locate her missing brother, and a lot of the main plot is caught up in the families who built the insurance company.
3. I like short, unique titles, preferably with a mischievous play on words. You know me.
I've been playing with words like smoke, fire, burning, insure, indemnity, loss, premium, coverage, family, heir, tree...
Any ideas here? Throw a girl a bone. Please.
Recently, I made a comment on Jenny Hilborne's post in the Crime Fiction Collective about my books having "roots." There's always a core subject from which the plot and subplots grow. In Freezer Burn, it was about having children and being a mother. Peri's investigation leads her to women who have had children out of wedlock, and she thinks she might be pregnant. In Hit or Missus, it's all about friendships and what we're willing to do for people we love, people we are not related to. In both, I tried to lay down the root without bias. You're free to decide for yourself whether you want to have a child, kill for a friend, etc.
This new book will need a little more editing than the first two, not in terms of line-edits, but in content. As I get closer to the finish, I see more clearly what the book's roots are, and I know I will need to go in and strengthen a few of the scenes. I also know not to do this for at least 3-4 weeks. It's weird, but I know from experience that if I go back and edit too soon, the book gets all muddled, kind of like over-mixing the bread batter.
I've got plenty of other projects to distract me, but I'm missing something from the new book that I already had with the first two: a title.
The working title is Burning Mad, but I don't really like it. Your mission, should you accept it, is to suggest some alternatives. Here are the highlights (no, I don't have a blurb or a logline yet):
1. The main plot revolves around Benny Needles' house burning (almost) down. There is, of course, a body discovered. Benny hires Peri to investigate why his house burned, why someone was in his house, and why the insurance company won't pay up and people are suing him for wrongful death.
2. The root of the story is about families and how we survive them. The Debussy family is having problems with their son, Benny is refusing to talk about his dad, Peri is trying to locate her missing brother, and a lot of the main plot is caught up in the families who built the insurance company.
3. I like short, unique titles, preferably with a mischievous play on words. You know me.
I've been playing with words like smoke, fire, burning, insure, indemnity, loss, premium, coverage, family, heir, tree...
Any ideas here? Throw a girl a bone. Please.
Sunday, July 1, 2012
My aching head
I've been writing as much as I can for the past week, and managed to get over 5,000 words written. Pretty good words, too. I was kind of set to add more today, once I got my housecleaning finished.
The problem is I have a fairly splitting headache, which is keeping the story from leaping out of my cranium. I absolutely hate to let the day be a waste, however, so I did a little marketing/promotional work for the bird in my hand. In other words, I made a new trailer for Hit or Missus.
What do you think?
The problem is I have a fairly splitting headache, which is keeping the story from leaping out of my cranium. I absolutely hate to let the day be a waste, however, so I did a little marketing/promotional work for the bird in my hand. In other words, I made a new trailer for Hit or Missus.
What do you think?
Monday, June 11, 2012
Yes, Sirree, I'm going places
Namely, I'm going to the Santa Barbara Writer's Conference tomorrow (that's Tuesday the 12th). Apart from speaking on a panel, I've never actually attended this conference, so I'm going to recommend it with the following caveat: it's run by some truly wonderful writers/editors/publishers/word enthusiasts, so I expect nothing but excellence from them.
Sadly, it's too late to register (the conference started on Saturday and ends this Thursday), but put it on your radar for next year. It's expensive, mostly because it's almost a week long, but it looks like you get a lot of bang for your buck. Plus, it's in Santa Barbara, which is beautiful.
I'm going to be one of a few people talking about being the entrepreneurial author. I've been thinking about it recently, and I've decided I'm the accidental indie. Self-publishing was the furthest thing from my mind until I wanted to publish a book of my columns and no one wanted to touch it. After I published What Would Erma Do? I still vowed that my mysteries would travel the traditional path.
It took several months of cumulative information about the publishing industry to get me to walk out on that skinny limb and self-pub Hit or Missus. Was it a rousing success that catapulted me to stardom and fame? Yeah, not so much. It's been more of a roller coaster, up one month and down the next, as I try different marketing tactics.
But I wouldn't trade the journey for the traditional route now. I love having control of my covers, my titles, and my marketing. I don't want to "never say never" to traditional publishing, but for right now, this is the right path for me.
One of the things that seems to make a difference is offering a one-day freebie on Kindle. Sales usually rise for the rest of the month. This is why I'm offering Hit or Missus for free tomorrow (that's Tuesday the 12th). If you're smart, you'll grab it up for your Kindle. If you're kind, you'll buy it (LOL).
In keeping with my embrace of self-publishing, I've decided to create a "home" for my books, as in an official press name. The first name I thought of was completely fitting: Dancing Corgi Press. I've had Joe Felipe hard at work designing a logo for me. So far, this is my favorite (but I still might want to mess with the font):
What say you?
Sadly, it's too late to register (the conference started on Saturday and ends this Thursday), but put it on your radar for next year. It's expensive, mostly because it's almost a week long, but it looks like you get a lot of bang for your buck. Plus, it's in Santa Barbara, which is beautiful.
I'm going to be one of a few people talking about being the entrepreneurial author. I've been thinking about it recently, and I've decided I'm the accidental indie. Self-publishing was the furthest thing from my mind until I wanted to publish a book of my columns and no one wanted to touch it. After I published What Would Erma Do? I still vowed that my mysteries would travel the traditional path.
It took several months of cumulative information about the publishing industry to get me to walk out on that skinny limb and self-pub Hit or Missus. Was it a rousing success that catapulted me to stardom and fame? Yeah, not so much. It's been more of a roller coaster, up one month and down the next, as I try different marketing tactics.
But I wouldn't trade the journey for the traditional route now. I love having control of my covers, my titles, and my marketing. I don't want to "never say never" to traditional publishing, but for right now, this is the right path for me.
One of the things that seems to make a difference is offering a one-day freebie on Kindle. Sales usually rise for the rest of the month. This is why I'm offering Hit or Missus for free tomorrow (that's Tuesday the 12th). If you're smart, you'll grab it up for your Kindle. If you're kind, you'll buy it (LOL).
![]() |
| Mikey, RIP, a Corgi |
| Duffy, also a Corgi |
What say you?
Wednesday, May 16, 2012
On your mark, get set...
Hop on over to Amazon and get your free copies of my books. Yes, all of them! Today only!
Here's the link to my Amazon page. You can download them and read them on your computer, you can download a Kindle App to your latest toy, so there's no excuse not to get them.
I'm taking a trip to Carmel to celebrate my anniversary with my hubby. (And if you're thinking of coming by to rob us while we're gone, I'm sorry, but our son is home from college this weekend.)
Enjoy.
Here's the link to my Amazon page. You can download them and read them on your computer, you can download a Kindle App to your latest toy, so there's no excuse not to get them.
I'm taking a trip to Carmel to celebrate my anniversary with my hubby. (And if you're thinking of coming by to rob us while we're gone, I'm sorry, but our son is home from college this weekend.)
| Ferocious, yes? |
Enjoy.
Sunday, December 25, 2011
Hit or Missus - Chapter 7
Good Christmas Morning, everyone! If you tuned in here to read another chapter, you're in luck. Our plucky heroine is just starting her assignment, and she has her hands full. Read on:
* * * * *
* * * * *
Well that sounds ominous. Is Peri their "mark"? What are they planning to mark her with, a Sharpie? Tune in next Sunday and learn more.
P.S. Did Santa bring you a new Kindle or Nook? You could be reading HIT OR MISSUS right now, for only 99 cents!
* * * * *
CHAPTER 7
The room was a study in contrasts. The polished oak of the tables, chairs and bar could have darkened the space, but the pale walls and full-length windows stretching across the back of the room lifted it into the light. There were a few occupied tables, and a couple of servers strode from the kitchen to the diners and back again. A black man with gray on his temples and a roadmap of years on his face wiped the bar, occasionally glancing at the TV screen, where a baseball game was in progress.
A young, lithe woman in a simple uniform of white shirt, black slacks, met Peri at the door and led her to a table near the windows. Nikki and her friends were seated near the bar, all as coiffed and beautiful as she imagined. She gave them a relaxed glance as she walked past, and catalogued two brunettes and an ash blonde in addition to Nikki's golden curls. One of the brunettes looked up from her salad, and Peri could feel the intensity of her gaze as much as she could see it in her peripheral vision.
The hostess offered her the seat beside the window. This didn't give Peri more than a slight side view of Nikki's table, but she didn't want to appear suspicious, so she sat down. The same woman came by to take her order. She asked for a spinach salad and iced tea, then opened the brochure and began to read.
Twenty thousand dollars? Peri fluffed her hair and tried not to grimace as she read. Plus annual dues? And monthly dues? She turned the page. Green fees? Isn't the golf course green enough?
Laying the packet aside, she studied her surroundings. To her left, golfers dotted the grassy carpet outside. She thought they looked similar in the way they walked around the area, faces tilted to the ground, occasionally looking up, as if gauging the distance. They were all tanned, wearing standard issue polo shirts, dressy shorts, white socks and golf shoes. The men wore hats. The women had a mix of hats and visors, but it didn't matter. Their faces were all still golden from the sun.
"Hey, Girlfriend."
Peri looked up to see Blanche, casually gorgeous in a pair of tailored, knee-length tan shorts and a sheer lilac blouse, the lace of a white camisole peeking out. She got up to hug her friend and gestured to a chair.
"How nice to see you," Peri told her.
They motioned to the server, who came over and took Blanche's order, giving Peri another opportunity to glance at Nikki's table. They were lively and loud, which meant it should be easy listening.
The server brought their drinks.
"So, thinking about joining?" Blanche pointed to the brochure.
"Possibly." She noticed the volume of her own voice. As much as she enjoyed having her friend here for support, it dawned on Peri she would not be listening to Nikki's table if there was too much conversation at her own.
"You're a member, maybe you could explain what this means." She placed the brochure next to Blanche and leaned in. As Blanche looked at the paper, Peri whispered, "I need you to identify who is talking at that table behind me."
"Hmm." Her friend pointed. "Oh, those fees only count if you aren't a resident. Here, give me a pen and I'll circle the ones you'd pay."
As the server arrived with their salads, Peri heard her cell phone. Tunneling through her wallet, car keys, and assorted flotsam, her fingers closed around a familiar object, a small digital voice recorder. She often used it to take notes. While her hand was still buried, she turned the recorder on. Perhaps she could capture their conversation and listen to it later.
Pulling her phone out, she looked at the number. "Skip."
"Did you guys kiss and make up?"
"You know we never stay mad for long." She swirled the baby spinach leaves around to coat them with raspberry vinaigrette and picked up a fork full of leaf, mango, and candied walnut. A crumb of feta cheese clung to the leaf and completed the sweet-salty-umame trinity in her mouth. "We've had worse arguments."
"Oh, yeah. I remember when you tried to live together."
"I might have thrown a few objects," Peri said.
"To get your point across?"
"Hairbrushes are good for punctuating sentences."
They laughed, loudly, until Peri noticed she wasn't hearing the women behind her. She looked at her friend and rolled her eyes in an attempt to point to the table she was watching. Blanche smiled and gave her a small nod.
"So what did Don say?" The question from the table was asked by a voice that sounded like a muted trumpet.
Peri looked at Blanche and pointed back to the brochure. "What about this?"
"Some people like to pay extra for that," Blanche said as she picked up the pen and scribbled, Susan Leske.
"Oh, I don't know." This voice was high, almost childlike.
Peri took the pen and wrote Nikki? Blanche nodded, as the voice continued. "He was all, 'Nikki, do you have to find the most expensive dress in the mall? Who is this Michael Course guy, anyway?'"
Several women joined her laughter.
"Course? Like golf course?" Peri noted this voice was lower, and the words had a bit of a slur to them. She wondered if this woman had lived in the South for awhile.
Lisa Silvan, Blanche wrote.
A soft, languid voice seemed to quiet the whole table. "Your husband needs a lesson in designers, that's all. Perhaps we could instruct him in the difference between Michael Kors and Alta Vista."
Laughter started again, although it didn't erupt as much as it bubbled.
"Oh, Kim, it doesn't matter." This was Nikki again. "Don doesn't really care. He just likes to tease me."
As Blanche scribbled another note in the sidelines, Peri heard Lisa say, "Clinton does the same to me. What are those shoes again? Choo-choo trains?' They tease us, but they love it when we look good."
"Which is why I'm so happily divorced," Susan said. "I have the Jimmy Choos and no one to get on my case about them."
The server came by Peri's table and offered more iced tea. She looked confused by the silence between the two women. Blanche put the brochure back in the folder. "I'm sure you can read all this when you get home."
"Thanks for the info," Peri told her. The server busied herself by taking their empty plates, so Peri turned to Blanche again. "How's the landscaping coming?" The question sounded so banal she felt like slapping herself, but it was the safest thing that popped into her head.
"It's a good thing Paul's on travel. Took us months to work out the design with the landscaper, and now every day is a brand new day for these guys. A new supervisor shows up, doesn't know what's been done, what's supposed to go next. Then I have to step in and undo the work…"
She said a lot more, but Peri's focus went back to the women behind her.
"Oh, Susan, how you tease," Nikki said.
"At least as long as those alimony checks keep coming," Susan added.
Lisa changed the subject. "Did you see this Sunday's LA Times?"
Peri heard Nikki say, "I so want that Kate Spade outfit in the magazine. Too cute."
"It was okay," Kim replied. "I wasn't crazy about the bag."
"I couldn't get past that hatchet piece on USC," Susan told them. "How dare they say our alma mater is egotistical."
"Bet the writer went to UCLA," said Kim.
"Kim, that's not exactly fair." Nikki's words were harsher than her delivery. "There are dozens of schools who envy USC."
"Shoot me now." Blanche's voice was a graveled murmur, but it was clear she had been listening, too. Peri choked down her laughter.
Lisa spoke. "So, what's our game for this week?"
Peri thought she saw unusual activity out of the corner of her eye. She resisted the impulse to turn and look, but got a brief impression of the women's arms reaching toward something in the center of the table. There was quiet chattering, none of it intelligible. She looked at her friend, her eyebrows raised in question. Blanche smiled back, so Peri knew she'd get the rundown later.
Peri heard the light pinging of glass upon glass. Someone was making a toast.
"Bettys rule," Nikki said.
Peri's phone began to vibrate again, so she turned to her bag and noticed the women all getting their purses out, too. They were preparing to pay, which meant she had to make her exit first. Her phone had stopped ringing, but she pretended to answer it anyway.
"Hey, you ready to go?" she said to no one. "Okay, I'm on my way."
She fished out a twenty and gave it to Blanche. "I need to pick up –," here she fumbled for a name, "Benny. This should cover my lunch."
"No problem, Kiddo. I'll see you later." Blanche held out the folder to her. "Don't forget this."
Peri picked up her tote and stood. As she walked toward the door, she heard Kim's voice again, although she couldn't make out the words. She did catch a comment about "ladies room" and saw money being taken out of bags, so she continued outside, to her car.
After reaching her car, Peri put her ball cap on again and assumed the air of the inconspicuous private eye. She read over Blanche's scribbles as she waited. According to her BFF, Kim Patterson was the long-haired brunette, Susan Leske had the darker complexion, and Lisa Silvan spoke with the southern lilt.
Blanche had written her notes next to the price list. Peri saw the numbers again and rubbed her neck. If she needed to follow Nikki Keller any deeper into that establishment, she may need Blanche's help as a member.
Peri finally saw Nikki walk out of the entrance, with two of the women at the table. Susan dug in her purse while Lisa turned to listen to Nikki. There was no sign of Kim. They all laughed and strolled to their cars, hugging as each one was dropped off.
Although they were of varying heights and hair color, the trio shared a common patina. Peri thought it was the glow of money, then scolded herself for judging.
They can't help it if they're rich.
She watched a blue Beemer and a silver Benz slip out. Nikki's convertible eventually reached the entrance, so Peri started her car and eased toward the driveway. She and a dark Range Rover with tinted windows arrived at the exit simultaneously, but the Range Rover paused and let her go first. Nikki made it across the intersection just as the light changed, making Peri wait. The light was mercifully short and Peri was able to see her target pull onto her home street.
Peri drove past the Keller enclave, planning to turn around at the next cul-de-sac, but the stream of luxury vehicles behind her made her travel further into the country club homes. Turning left got rid of some of the cars, but the Range Rover still tried to push her down the street, obviously trying to get home. Finally, it turned into a driveway and Peri could return to Nikki's house.
As she rounded the corner, Peri felt her car grab to the right, then heard the familiar thwop-thwop of a flat tire. She pulled over to the curb and got out.
The tire slumped against the pavement, giving her Honda a definite list to starboard. Peri looked up the street in time to see Nikki's car whip out, toward Alta Vista.
Damn.
There was nothing to be done, except change the tire. Peri opened the trunk and peered inside. It wasn't a pretty sight. In addition to two plastic bins of paper she needed to file, the trunk was littered with papers she needed to put into the bins, along with a pair of running shoes, an emergency roadside kit, and a small bag, which was stuffed with a few toiletries and clean underwear, in case she had to tail anyone for more than a day.
So far, she'd used the roadside kit more than the toiletry bag.
Peri thought briefly about changing the tire herself. It wasn't rocket science, after all. She moved the trunk contents to her back seat, then lifted the carpet to find the spare tire release and the jack kit.
It took her exactly five minutes and two fingernails to realize that, although she had the brains for the procedure, she lacked the brawn. She called the Auto Club and spent her waiting time throwing loose papers into the plastic bins.
After an hour wait, then thirty minutes more while the tire was changed, Peri was finally able to drive, although not in pursuit of Nikki Keller. Hungry again, she stopped on the way home to pick up skordalia chicken from Sophia's, the local Greek restaurant. She felt like everyone's eyes were on her car as she drove; the little blue Honda still sat at a tilt with its emergency donut where a real tire should have been. Car troubles sharpened her cranky edge, so she decided to spend the evening working out a schedule for tomorrow.
She pulled into her driveway and stopped. Ordinarily, she left the car parked next to the front door. Her one-car garage sat back, detached from the house, and as much as she loved her older neighborhood, walking to the garage at night to get her car out made the hair on the back of her neck stand up. But she wouldn't be going out tonight, so she went ahead and yanked the garage door open, drove the car in and locked it up.
Having learned from the previous afternoon's encounter with the cat, Peri entered her house slowly, looking down to keep from stepping on the large tabby. Mr. Mustard was nowhere near. She set the food on the counter and walked through the rooms, turning on lights.
"Here Kitty-Kitty," she called.
There was no response.
"Mr. Mustard, Kitty-kitty-kitty." Peri looked in all the corners of the living room. "Great, I've lost the cat."
As she moved toward her bedroom, she heard a soft, shuffling noise, followed by thumping. She slipped off her shoes and tiptoed to the door, hoping it was the cat and not an intruder.
The sight before her made her wish for the latter. Mr. Mustard had found an old spool of red and green curling ribbon, probably under her bed, and had wound it around every object in the room. It was knotted around all of the legs of her shaker-style furniture, and had actually pulled the nightstand away from the wall, knocking a candle onto the floor. Pillows were on the floor as well, and one of them showed definite signs of shredding.
The cat was busily pushing the now-empty spool through the maze he'd created. He looked at Peri, jumped straight up, and then ran out of the room.
Peri looked around, trying to decide whether to eat first, or clean first, and whether she might actually be able to flush a cat. Cleaning won. She armed herself with a pair of scissors and a trash bag, and went to work. Half an hour later, she finally sat down in the kitchen with her dinner and her notes.
She was enjoying a mouthful of the rich, lemony chicken when she felt a warm, furry body rubbing her shins.
"We gotta find you a new home, cat."
As she read through her scribbles about Nikki and her friends, a rhythmic beep-beep-beep interrupted her study. She picked up her phone, but it wasn't the source of the noise.
The next ten minutes were spent checking clocks, smoke alarms, kitchen gadgets and anything else that might be setting off a warning signal. Peri finally narrowed the sound to her pink snakeskin tote in the living room. She dumped the contents onto the floor and sorted through her portable life until she found her digital voice recorder. A tiny red light flashed with each beep.
"Oh, yeah, I forgot I turned you on." She picked up the small, silver rectangle and took it back to the kitchen.
After another bite of dinner, Peri turned on the recorder and listened. There was a fair amount of extraneous noise from the room, but she could clearly hear the women's voices. She worked her way slowly through the recording, identifying each voice and taking notes on what was said. The conversation was pretty benign, even boring, by Peri's standards.
Right after Lisa asked about the game plan, she heard the server ask about more tea and turned the volume up to listen to as much of the background voices as she could. All she got were disjointed words, "blonde", "one of us", "discourage", and "force". She replayed the section several times, trying to add one more word to make it all make sense, but the ambient noise overpowered.
At last, she gave up and let the recording continue to the end. She heard the scrape of the chair as she arose, and the fluctuation of sounds as she moved through the room. Closing her eyes, she pictured where she was at each rasp, rattle, and voice. Suddenly one voice became clear.
"There goes the mark," Kim said in a whisper.
Peri's pulse trotted a little faster, wondering if she was Kim's "mark". She listened to the last part a few more times, but was unable to hear anything else. Leaning back in her chair, she speared another piece of chicken and put it in her mouth. She chewed, thinking.
If I could somehow separate the different sounds like they do on those TV shows. Grabbing her cell phone, she called Jason Bonham. He probably wouldn't be able to process her file, but he might be able to tell her what kind of software program would.
Mark or not, she was going to find out the game for the week.
* * * * *
Well that sounds ominous. Is Peri their "mark"? What are they planning to mark her with, a Sharpie? Tune in next Sunday and learn more.
P.S. Did Santa bring you a new Kindle or Nook? You could be reading HIT OR MISSUS right now, for only 99 cents!
Sunday, December 18, 2011
Hit or Missus - Chapter 6
I have a couple of things to point out about today's chapter. First, when you meet Linda, know that I secretly want to be her. Well, I guess it's not such a secret now. What I mean to say is that I am a short redheaded gal who sometimes catches a glimpse of herself in the mirror and thinks there's a gnome in the house, and I would love to be that tall, graceful woman of a certain age who dresses with taste and comports herself with great dignity. I amuse myself by thinking Dale would not have married that woman.
Second, I had a hard time writing the scene where Peri goes to the country club. I'll talk about it after you read.
* * * * *
* * * * *
Were you back in high school, too, as Peri walked into that room? If so, were you sitting with the cool kids or the chick with the wrinkled khakis?
In my original draft, Peri didn't go into the country club at all. Concerned about her appearance, she went back to her car and waited. The problem was, the scene wasn't working.
How did I know?
It felt flat, like Peri was doing all this surveillance, but nothing was really happening. Going back to her car and waiting for Nikki was boring. There was also something about Peri's character returning to her car that felt stilted and unnatural.
After a lot of head scratching I finally figured it out. I had broken two rules. One, I had let the tension wane by keeping Peri out of potential danger. Two, I had forced her to do something out of her character. Peri is too stubborn and curious to let wilted khakis and a sad polo shirt stop her from getting information. She wouldn't walk away.
So I rewrote the scene and had her go into the country club, and all the way into the restaurant. In my second draft, she went in alone. When I rewrote again, I had Blanche join her as a way of giving Peri someone to bounce ideas off, and get information from.
As always, HIT OR MISSUS is available from Amazon, Barnes & Noble, other booksellers, and the right side of this blog, where you can purchase an autographed copy from the author.
Second, I had a hard time writing the scene where Peri goes to the country club. I'll talk about it after you read.
* * * * *
CHAPTER 6
Under normal conditions, Peri liked to show up early in a client's neighborhood and park a few houses away to observe the comings and goings of the person she was tracking. The Kellers lived near the Alta Vista Country Club, their house backing up to the golf course. This small area around the country club was the high-end of Placentia; the homes were large, even if the lot sizes were small, and all of them maintained their million-dollar worth, regardless of the economy.
Mr. Keller had told Peri his wife was usually still asleep when he left at seven, but Peri didn't want to miss anything, so she pulled into the Alta Vista community a little past six in the morning. The Keller house was on a corner, which would not have made parking in an unobtrusive spot difficult, but her first pass through the quiet streets made her realize she couldn't park anywhere and remain unnoticed. A little blue Honda sedan would be considered nondescript in most neighborhoods, but not here. The curbs were littered with BMWs and Audis, and her econo-car would stand out like a sore thumb.
She passed a jogger as she drove around the block to the main drag out of the enclave, and tried not to watch the woman stare at her. In her rear view mirror, she saw the easy kick of tanned legs as the jogger tossed one more glance over her shoulder and continued on her route. This was not going to be easy.
The thoroughfare onto their street was not so ritzy. Block walls bordered the sidewalks, making the boulevard look stark. A few random cars were parked here, of the more economical variety. Peri found a spot on the side where she could blend in with the others and still see a corner of the Kellers' driveway. She might not be able to see details, but she could at least tell when a car was pulling into or out of the drive. Tucking down in the seat, she pulled her black ball cap over her brow, put her camera in her lap, and waited for movement.
A few minutes later, she saw the jogger again, running toward her at a healthy pace. Peri tried to push her tall frame further into the seat, but the woman didn't appear to notice her, allowing Peri to get a better look. The woman looked sleek in her fitted running clothes, black spandex capris and a turquoise, racer-back top. She wore a matching ball cap and Peri could see a long brunette ponytail swing like a pendulum as she ran.
She was definitely from the neighborhood. Peri had seen plenty of these women, and was always amazed at the 'something extra' they possessed. It wasn't that their skin was just tanned, it was golden and smooth, as if they had it buffed and polished every morning. And their hair wasn't simply blonde or brunette, it had an additional sheen of copper or silver or gold to make it burn brilliant in the sun. They wore makeup that never smudged and lipstick that never disappeared from their soft, unwrinkled lips.
Looking that good must be exhausting, even if I had the money. Peri licked her lips. They were dry, as usual, so she applied some balm.
By seven o'clock, she watched Keller drive out in his Mercedes SUV, a sleek dark silver model that exuded luxury. She thought he glanced at her car, but wasn't sure. A few other residents drove past, but none paid any attention to her. A flickering light in her rear view mirror distracted her, so she looked up.
It was a police car.
Although she wasn't doing anything illegal, she had a sudden urge to hide her activities. Rumor had it, the police didn't really like private investigators and might try to make her job difficult.
She stashed her camera under the seat, and fumbled in her glove compartment as the officer approached, looking for her insurance card, registration, and a reason to be parked in a high-end neighborhood. There was a first-aid kit, a flashlight, two old tampons and a notebook. She took the notebook.
"You okay, ma'am?" The officer stood just behind her open, driver's side window. Peri recognized him at once, Officer Kenneth Chou.
"Yes, Officer. Is there a problem?"
"No, ma'am, we just had a report that a car had been stopped here for awhile."
"And you wanted to make sure I wasn't dead or something?"
The young, Asian policeman smiled. "Or something."
Peri held up her notebook. "I'm taking notes."
His smile remained, unchanged.
"I'm counting the number of cars in the morning, to see whether we need a traffic light at the intersection."
He continued to smile.
His stare was making her nervous, but she tried not to let it show. "There are a lot of new homes here, you know. Traffic has increased. We need to think about the children who walk to school this way."
A car rolled by them, so Peri wrote in the notebook. "See? There goes one more."
She wasn't certain if he believed her, but he suddenly spoke. "Aren't you Detective Carlton's friend? I don't know if you remember me, but I worked the Needles case."
"Yes… yes, of course… Officer Chou, isn't it? How have you been?"
"Good, thanks. You working a case?"
"Kind of." Peri didn't want to give away too much information. "I'm doing some research for a background check. Pulled over to write up some notes."
"Oh, sure. If another call comes in, I'll handle it."
"Thanks, Officer." Peri smiled at him. "I'll be going soon, anyway."
She watched him walk back to his car, talk on his radio and prepare to leave. As he pulled away from the curb, the jogger reappeared in Peri's side mirror. This time, she caught the glimpse of a tattoo on the woman's ankle, obscured by her sock. Again, she didn't look over at Peri as she passed, but Peri could have sworn she saw the woman smile.
The street grew quiet again and Peri settled back to wait. An hour later, she finally saw a metallic blue BMW whip out of the development, with a stunning blonde behind the wheel. This was Nikki Keller, in all her morning glory.
Peri rolled away from the curb, watching Nikki turn left onto Alta Vista Street before she drove forward to follow. Even though it was small, the little sports car was easy to tail from a safe distance, and Peri's Honda was able to get lost among the rest of the vehicles on the road.
She traipsed along as her client's wife ran mindless errands, to the dry cleaners and the local Bank of America, before stopping at the Brea Mall. Peri watched Mrs. Keller enter the Glen Ivy Day Spa. The spa offered everything from massages to pedicures. After waiting ten minutes, Peri entered.
The front desk sat at the entrance to a gift shop on the right and a lounge area to the left. A small door past the chairs probably led to the spas. The piped-in music was an inoffensive tune played by a trio of harp, flute and running water, and the scents of several flowers and herbs fought for control of Peri's nose. A young woman, exotic in an Asian-Hispanic-Polynesian way, looked up from her computer screen behind the desk and smiled at Peri as she approached.
The phone rang and the girl answered. "Just a moment," Peri heard her say, then watched her walk over to the gift shop.
It was an opportunity Peri couldn't resist. She quickly moved around to the side of the desk and scanned the appointments on the computer screen. Nikki Keller was here for a manicure and pedicure with Emma. The girl returned.
"Sorry about that," she said. "May I help you?"
"I was interested in your services. Do you have a brochure?"
The young girl handed Peri a small catalogue, done in soft neutrals and matte finish. Peri thanked her and left, returning to her car.
As she waited for Nikki to finish her manicure, Peri read the brochure. Holy crap, fifty bucks to get your nails painted? At some point, she might need to get chummy with Emma, but not until she had to, not at those prices.
Two hours later, Nikki's next stop was the Alta Vista Country Club. The club was a jewel in Placentia's crown, a yawning sea of greens that reached up to Rose Avenue, crossed Alta Vista and came to rest at Buena Vista Street.
Peri parked in a section far away from Nikki's sports car and checked her watch. Twelve thirty seemed too late for a golf game, but what did she know? A jaunty little tune began playing in her Bluetooth, so she tapped her earpiece and answered.
"You busy?" Blanche's voice was unmistakable.
"Working a case. I'm waiting outside the country club, thinking of going in. Why?"
"No reason. I got the day off and was bored. Thought I'd see if you wanted to come over."
Peri had an idea. "Want to join me for lunch at Alta Vista?"
"Oooh, can I be part of your operation?"
"Yeah, my very special ops team – of one. I'll go in and get us a table and nose around for info."
"I'm ten minutes away."
Removing her ball cap, she fluffed her hair away from her scalp, and then put on a pair of wire-rimmed glasses with clear lenses. She also slipped out of her gray zippered hoodie, before stepping out of the car.
Tall glass and wood doors stood at the end of a long colonnade of stone columns, which supported an oxidized metal roof. Square, window-paned lights hung inside, illuminating the way.
Peri watched herself walk toward the door in its glass reflection and stopped. When did her khakis get so wrinkled? And her blue polo shirt, the one she liked so much because it brought out the blue in her eyes, looked baggy and tired. Were these people going to believe she could afford to join their country club?
She took another step forward. Dressed up or not, someone should be able to give me information.
She hesitated. But I might get more information if I was dressed like everyone else.
Peri watched her hands smooth over her slacks in the reflection. Beyond her image, inside the clubhouse, she saw someone walking past. With a deep breath, Peri set her shoulders back, lifted her chin and reached for the brass handle.
Maybe Skip is right, I do need a little shopping trip. After I talk to some employees in this place.
The foyer was large and reflected the craftsman-style architecture of the exterior. Rich browns and caramels with slashes of burgundy were brightened by the light from the floor-to-ceiling windows that peeked from the rooms in the back. Peri heard the quiet murmur of a man's voice announcing scores, so she guessed one of the rooms was a bar.
An older woman was on the phone, checking a computer screen. "I see a foursome for tomorrow morning," she told the caller. "But nothing under Barber."
While she waited for the crisis to be resolved, Peri looked at the latest newsletter. Very glossy, high end printing with lots of pictures, it told of members and their accomplishments, as well as their absences. Peri recognized Don Keller's partner, John Patterson, in a small blurb about having knee surgery. The article wished him a speedy recovery, as the Heritage Golf Tournament and Banquet was coming up.
The woman turned toward Peri and smiled. "May I help you?"
"My boyfriend and I were thinking of joining the club, and I was wondering if you had any brochures."
The woman stood, almost as tall as Peri, and reached across the desk. She was elegant in her crisp, long-sleeved white shirt and navy slacks, her silver hair pulled back in a loose ponytail. A small pin on her shirt said 'Linda'. Holding out a blue folder with a business card, she told Peri, "This folder has all of our fees, and services. And this is the manager's card. You can call Jeff if you have any-"
At that moment, a collected burst of laughter from the bar interrupted them.
Peri smiled at her. "Sounds like a lively crew."
"Yes, that group of ladies meets here for lunch every week."
"Wow, so they're members - do they play golf here as well?"
"Oh, yes, they're a regular foursome."
Peri nodded and smiled. "How lovely, to have a group of friends to do things together." She picked up the folder. "Thank you so much, Linda. I have to discuss this with my boyfriend, but I hope to be in touch soon."
Another round of laughter could be heard from beyond the foyer. Peri looked up, tapped the folder against her palm, and hesitated. "You know, maybe I'll have lunch here, if it's okay. Give me time to read over this information and see if I have any questions."
"Absolutely," Linda told her. "Our restaurant is open to the public."
Peri turned toward the bar and felt her chest tighten. If she guessed right, Nikki's group of friends would be as casually perfect as darling Nikki. She smoothed her wrinkled khakis one more time, blew out the air she had trapped in her lungs, and walked toward the restaurant.
It felt like being back in high school.
* * * * *
Were you back in high school, too, as Peri walked into that room? If so, were you sitting with the cool kids or the chick with the wrinkled khakis?
In my original draft, Peri didn't go into the country club at all. Concerned about her appearance, she went back to her car and waited. The problem was, the scene wasn't working.
How did I know?
It felt flat, like Peri was doing all this surveillance, but nothing was really happening. Going back to her car and waiting for Nikki was boring. There was also something about Peri's character returning to her car that felt stilted and unnatural.
After a lot of head scratching I finally figured it out. I had broken two rules. One, I had let the tension wane by keeping Peri out of potential danger. Two, I had forced her to do something out of her character. Peri is too stubborn and curious to let wilted khakis and a sad polo shirt stop her from getting information. She wouldn't walk away.
So I rewrote the scene and had her go into the country club, and all the way into the restaurant. In my second draft, she went in alone. When I rewrote again, I had Blanche join her as a way of giving Peri someone to bounce ideas off, and get information from.
As always, HIT OR MISSUS is available from Amazon, Barnes & Noble, other booksellers, and the right side of this blog, where you can purchase an autographed copy from the author.
Sunday, December 11, 2011
Hit or Missus - Chapter 5
Good Sunday morning, everyone!
Here's your next chapter of Hit or Missus. I thought I'd do something a little fun with the text today. I've attached links to some of the places mentioned in the chapter. That way, if you're interested in where Peri and Skip go around town, you can look things up easily.
* * * * *
Here's your next chapter of Hit or Missus. I thought I'd do something a little fun with the text today. I've attached links to some of the places mentioned in the chapter. That way, if you're interested in where Peri and Skip go around town, you can look things up easily.
* * * * *
CHAPTER 5
Two steps into her kitchen, Peri's shins made contact with a soft but immovable object. She stuttered forward, trying to stay on both feet and hold onto the bag of Chinese food she'd just bought at Pick Up Stix. The object yowled as her foot came down on it and she fell to her knees, sending her chicken teriyaki bowl and egg rolls dashing across the floor and into the wall, where the container tops exploded.
"Ow-ow-ow." Pain pulsed from her hands to her elbows, her knees to her hips. She eased back onto her heels and rubbed her palms, looking at the chaos that was supposed to be her lunch, now splashed on the wall and floor.
Her new guest wandered over to the mess and sniffed. He picked up a piece of chicken and proceeded to shred and eat it.
"Damn cat, I forgot about you." Peri stood and limped to the paper towels.
Mr. Mustard sat and licked his paws while she picked up the food, then bolted away when she got out the spray bottle of cleanser.
Later, as she curled on the couch and ate a peanut butter sandwich while reading her notes, she felt a warm prickle on the back of her neck, as though she was being watched. She looked up to find two large, yellow eyes staring, unblinking, at her.
"Finding everything you need here?" She reached out and rubbed his ear. "Poor kitty, losing Bob and Dottie within a month. Don't worry, I'll find a good home for you. Someone who loves kitties."
Peri finished her sandwich and thought about Bob and Dottie. It wasn't unusual for elderly couples to die within weeks, or even days, of each other. Still, she thought it was curious.
She wadded up her napkin, and heard a strange, giggling sound. The cat at her side leaped to attention, staring at the paper ball in her hand. She held it up.
"You want this?"
The cat's tail vibrated. Peri threw the napkin across the room and watched him run after it, capture it, and return to her, the napkin in his mouth. She laughed and threw it again. The tabby gave chase, then dropped the napkin at her feet and waited. They spent a few minutes in this game, until the cat suddenly walked away and curled up in the window for a nap.
Peri thought about their game, and remembered the morning's events.
The paper Mr. Mustard gave me – "DECIDE NOW" – what was that phone number? She closed her eyes and visualized the note. It had been written in bold, dark print, making it easy to recall. Five-five-five, oh-six-two-four. She reached for the phone and dialed.
A woman answered, her voice low and words enunciated. "Keller and Patterson, how may I direct your call?"
"I'm sorry, I think I misdialed - is this 555-2624?"
"No, ma'am, it's oh-six-two-four."
Peri apologized once more and hung up. Why would Dottie have a note to call her client's office?
Forcing herself back to her own case, she logged on to her laptop and did a preliminary hunt for Nikki Simms Keller. A pass through the woman's internet presence was enough to give Peri indigestion. According to Classmates, Nikki Simms enjoyed life as a high school cheerleader before attending the University of Southern California as a communications major.
She checked Facebook next. Usually, people had their privacy settings so no one could read their information, but updates to the online social network sometimes reset preferences. Nikki's privacy settings were in the middle of the road, so Peri could see some of her information, such as her friends, her photos, and her notes.
Looking at her friends' photos, Peri saw one that looked familiar, Carol Hanlon. Carol was a woman she had once cleaned house for and was now in her Facebook friend list. She guessed Carol was Nikki's friend because they both belonged to the Alta Vista Country Club. Clicking on Carol's name, Peri was able to read some of Nikki's status updates.
"Party time tonight for all my Bettys," was the latest.
What are Bettys"? Peri searched the Internet, trying to figure out the meaning. Google was of no help; all of the pages were about businesses with 'Betty' in the name.
"No, I don't mean Betty's Baked Goods," she told her computer.
She printed basic information about her client's wife, including her previous addresses and criminal history. Peri glanced at them as she put them into a large purple folder with a number on the top. Apart from a few recent traffic citations, Nikki had no criminal history, and it didn't look like she had spent any significant time outside California.
The question of Dottie Peters and Don Keller's development firm tugged at the back of Peri's brain, so she decided to take a break and do a little digging in another direction. She was still wandering aimlessly through Dottie and Bob's histories when she heard a key in the back door, followed by the sound of the hinges, a simultaneous thump and cat's scream, and then Skip's growling expletives.
"Watch out for the cat," she said.
An orange streak flashed by her as the cat ran toward the bedroom. Skip walked in a few moments later with a bottle of beer.
"Thanks for the warning." He reached down and kissed her before collapsing into the couch.
"Rough day?"
"Not bad, except for Dottie. Death just leaves me feeling kinda… spent."
Peri put her laptop aside and wrapped her arms around him. "Sorry, Babe. Even when someone's older, it's hard." She kissed his neck. "And the older I get, the younger Dottie seemed."
They sat, entwined, for awhile, listening to the music from the stereo. Peri had put on Joe Sample, and the strains of smooth jazz piano floated through the room like a grown-up lullaby.
She reached for his beer. "What's for dinner?"
He glanced at his watch. "It's pretty early. We could go for sushi."
Peri caught his wrist and checked the time. "Five on a Tuesday. Hmm, I guess Fish in a Bottle won't be that busy."
Their heads bent together towards the watch, his upper lip close enough to brush her lower one. In less than a second, they were kissing, losing themselves in the moment while they tried not to spill the beer.
"How hungry are you?" He nuzzled her neck. "Could we get something a little later?"
"Mmm, sounds tempting, but I could eat shoe leather right now. The damn cat spilled my lunch."
He kissed her again. "Here one day and he's already ruining our love life."
She stroked his cheek. "Well, feed me and we can get back to business."
* * * * *
Check back next Sunday for Chapter 6, or buy it now and read for yourself!
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