A Twofer!

First, the good news - FREEZER BURN is a Kindle Countdown Deal, which means it is yours for the low-low price of 99 cents until May 25th. Don't put it off until the last minute! Here's the link to go buy it NOW - http://www.amazon.com/Freezer-Burn-Peri-Minneopa-Mysteries-ebook/dp/B007ZHVDN4/

Now, for the best news - CLEAN SWEEP is Free! Yes, today through May 22, you can get this fun short story for ZERO cents. Yes, that's 0. Nada. No-risk reading, right? Here's that link - http://www.amazon.com/dp/B004U37614

Tomorrow's the big day... what haven't I told you? Tune in and find out!

The trouble with trailers

I haven't posted anything recently, due to the fact that I've been insanely preoccupied with everything from getting my tax info together (something I vow to keep up with all year, but abandon by June), to working with the kids in the riding academy, to stressing over the reception for my son's recital.

I've also been musing, ruminating, noodling over a problem. It's not just my own problem, it belongs to a lot of authors, I think.

What do we do with book trailers?

Let me begin by saying that I think books should embrace all media. As our electronic age opens more doors, books have a wonderful advantage. You can sit down with a physical thing and feel the paper as you turn the pages and smell the ink and the glue from the binding and get lost in the words. Or you can press a button on a slim device and conjure up a story that comes with hyperlinks to pictures of things you've never seen and maybe even music playing in the background, and you can still get lost in the words.

I keep thinking book trailers will find their niche in the advertising scheme of things. They're out there, I know. My friends make them for their books. I even have friends who make trailers for other people's books. James Patterson gets his trailers on network TV, usually during episodes of Castle.

Like he needs more readers.

There needs to be a place for trailers to go, apart from YouTube and the author's website, etc. Some ideas I've had:

- A Book Trailer Channel. Twenty-four hours a day, nothing but trailers.

- A feature on trailers on NPR or other sites or TV channels that feature book reviews.

- Access to trailers for bookstores, either brick-and-mortar or internet, so they can display them on monitors in a store or in the corner of their website banner.

Got any other ideas? Maybe we could put our heads together and come up with a plan.

In the meantime, here are my three, promoting my Peri Minneopa Mystery Series:

FREEZER BURN:



HIT OR MISSUS:



THE HOT MESS:

 

Back to business

As anxious as I am to move on to the next book, The Hot Mess still deserves my attention. I like this book a lot, which I know sounds silly from an author. We're supposed to love all our books, the way we love all our children. (Okay, since I only have one child, that's pretty easy for me.) But we love our children differently.

I loved Freezer Burn because it was my first mystery novel and I was able to tell the story with a fun cast of characters and a plot that wasn't too full of holes. The whole thing was joyful. I especially loved the references to 40s film stars.

Hit or Missus was a difficult child, but I love it because it's more complex than Freezer Burn. I love the chick-lit elements of fashion and the elbow-rubbing Peri gets to do with the richer side of the Placentia tracks. Oddly, I hadn't planned to bring Benny Needles into this story, but my readers begged for him, so I relented. I'm glad I did. I enjoy him in this, as the little needy man who seems inept, until he displays some unknown talent that makes him indispensable.

The Hot Mess began as just the third story. It had possibilities. I planned to burn Benny's house down, put a body inside for good measure, and see how he melted down. What I ended up with was a story about people and families and secrets and tragedies and I love it. I love Peri and Benny's relationship in this. I love learning so much about their respective families. I love it that Skip and Peri have an active and exciting love life.

As with all my other books, I'm doing a giveaway via Goodreads. You've got until January 20th to enter. I chose that date because, well, it seemed like a good idea at the time. The bad news is that I'm only opening this contest to US residents. I'm sorry, I know I'm being selfish, but the last time I opened the contest to US, Canada, Australia, and the UK. Most of the winners were from Canada and Australia. This not only cost me extra $$ in terms of postage, but Canada's mail system was on strike at the time, so the US was not mailing anything to Canada until it was resolved. It took me weeks to get the darned books sent.

Here's the link to enter: http://www.goodreads.com/book/show/16249116-the-hot-mess.

I hope you win.

Listening to the voices in my head

When I began writing Freezer Burn, I knew my main character. My buddy Robin and I had joked around about "Peri Menopause, Private Eye" for such a long time, it was easy to give her a better name and make her a real woman.

For this new mystery, I had the idea for a murder, but not characters, so I had to invent a new population. Would my main character be male or female? Amateur sleuth or seasoned professional? After much thinking, I decided on a female sleuth. I made her younger than Peri and mostly different. Peri is a tall, icy blonde. Willie (short for Wilhelmina) Adams is a short, curvy brunette. She is a little like me in that she has to watch her weight more than she'd like, and she'd like to pay more attention to her looks than she does. She is unlike me in that she is a widow.

I considered giving her children, but in the end thought she might be more interesting to be a woman who thought her life was going down the married-with-children route until her husband died of pancreatic cancer. Now she's in her 30s and wondering if that ship has sailed, and how she feels about it.

How do I know how her husband died? Because once I started to write her life story, in her voice, she told me. If you write, you know this feeling. If you don't, all I can say is that you give your characters a few physical, emotional, and behavioral boundaries, and they do the rest.

Here is Willie's story (please forgive her for the occasional grammar lapse - she thinks she's just writing for me):

I thought I'd have the normal life. Married with children. A job, maybe a career. They say we plan and God laughs.

I grew up in a suburb of Chicago. We were very middle class average people. Dad was Irish, Mom was German. I could have been a tall, fetching redhead. Instead I got the wrong side of both tracks. Dad's shortness, mom's curves, dad's freckles, mom's dark hair. We did normal family stuff. Went to church on Sundays after bbq'ing with friends on Saturday nights.

Maybe it started to go awry when I went to college. I was the baby although not by much. I have a sister one year older and a brother 3 years older. We didn't give Mom much time to do anything but raise us.

When I moved into the dorms at U of Illinois and began taking classes for a teaching career, I started to see how my mom sacrificed for us and how I didn't want to spend my life taking care of kids.

I changed my major after a trip to the counseling office, to engineering. Mom thought I was pissing away money on a degree I'd toss once I got married. Dad didn't say anything, but kept paying the tuition. I got my BS in CS and was recruited to work at a big aerospace company on the west coast. I had just moved into my new apartment when Trina, my sis, called.

Dad had a heart attack and died. Trina and my brother Stefan still lived in Chicago, but somehow Mom thought I should be the one to move home with her. I wasn’t married, didn’t have a family, etc. I gave up the new job and apartment and moved back. It’s what dutiful children do, right?

The first year was rough. We were both grieving our loss, and acting out as people do, by being alternately angry and clingy with each other. It slowly started to get better. We each found our own niche in the household and worked together instead of battling over territories. One year after Dad was gone, the light switched back on in Mom’s spirit.

Actually, it was less of a light and more of a disco ball. It seems Mom woke up one morning and realized all she had sacrificed as a wife and mother, and set out to reclaim her freedom. Suddenly she was never home. She found a group of single women her age and they were always out to have as much frivolous fun as possible. There was a lot of shopping, a lot of drinking and dancing, and a lot of money running out of the house.

I had gotten a job at a bookstore back home, the only thing I could find that at least kept my mind active. There were no engineering jobs in the Chicago vicinity for me. But I had money coming in. Dad had left Mom comfortable, had she continued with the lifestyle they once shared. I could see this new way of living was going to drain every bit of money he had left her. She was in her fifties and in fine health. She’d also never worked outside the home.

I tried not to butt in, but finally I had to speak up. I had seen her latest bank statement and it was a train wreck. I sat her down and showed her the statement and pointed out the increase in her expenses. I even extrapolated a few numbers, to show her how soon her money would run out if she kept spending this way. The house was paid for, but she still had taxes and insurance and utilities. She could sell the house and get some money from that, but it would not solve the problem of her out of control spending.

She said the most amazing thing to me: “We’ll pay the household expenses out of your pay. You may have to get another job to support us both.”

I met Trina and Stefan for lunch that day, and explained the entire situation to them. Then I packed my bags and bought a one-way fare to southern California. There was only so much duty a dutiful daughter would perform. Enabling my mom’s second childhood was not on the menu.

Mom stopped speaking to me. I heard via my sibs that she refused to cut back or slow down, despite their protests. Stefan even explored legal action, but when a person is sane there’s not much you can do. You can’t fix stupid.

I quickly found a job at a video game company. It’d be fun to say I write all these great games, but they wanted my services in the administrative end, so I work on their employee database, payroll software, game catalogs, processes, etc.

That’s where I met Tom Adams. He was exactly the kind of guy I was attracted to — not too tall, the kind of strikingly awkward looks that made him adorable, and a sense of humor. We hit it off like peas in a pod. Although we both knew from the start that we were completely compatible, we took our time with courtship. Neither of us was in a hurry to run off and marry. I enjoyed being in the relationship, and so did he. After a year, we moved in together.

Two years later, we married. It wasn’t a huge affair, but my sibs came out to celebrate with us. Mom returned the invitation. “Recipient Unknown.”

Life was so much fun. We went to concerts and plays, saw the latest movies, had friends over for dinner, did the big fat social scene. Tom wanted kids, and so did I, but we weren’t in a hurry. We had plenty of time.

Then one day Tom woke with a stomach pain that kept hurting the next day and the next. After a week, he went to the doctor. There were tests and tests and more tests, and painkillers because the pain was increasing. I drove him everywhere. He used up a lot of his sick days. It took two weeks to diagnose him. Pancreatic cancer.

Two months later he was dead.

Trina and Stefan were out in sunny SoCal again, except it wasn’t so sunny anymore. They helped me with everything, along with my friends. Quite frankly, it was all a blur. I thought I knew what grief felt like, after Dad died. I had no idea what it was like to lose someone who was beyond family, more than close, intimate in ways that you don’t discuss in polite society. When my eyes weren’t weeping, my soul was.

Mom was still a no-show, which was doubly painful. I thought that, being a sudden widow herself, she might have reached out to me. Stefan reported that she had finally opened her bank statement one day and realized she had a thousand dollars left. Dad had left her $250,000 and she had one thousand left. She called my brother in a panic. Taxes were due, what was she to do?

He got out the newspaper and turned to the Help Wanted section. Then he got out his checkbook. “This is the only money I’m going to give you. Your children tried to warn you and you wouldn’t listen. We are not going to pay for your mistakes. You will have to get a job now and re-learn how to live on a budget.”

She’s not speaking to him now, either. Oh, she cashed the check, but she’s not speaking.

Eventually, he and Trina had to go back to Chicago, and I had to re-learn how to live as a single gal. My friends helped me a little, for awhile. I tried not to burden them with my recovery, and they tried to include me in everything they were doing. The problem was that they were couples and I was not. After a few months, I started to feel the awkwardness instead of the comfort. It was not their fault. They were always inviting, warm, friendly. Maybe they just made me miss Tom too much.

I took the advice of every columnist on the planet. I got a dog for company, a schnauzer I named Hansel. He kept me from spending my days in bed. I signed up for classes, did volunteer work, tried new things to keep busy. Most of it didn’t fit, until I tried horse riding lessons.

I had wanted to ride as a child, but Mom always said no. “Too expensive. We can’t afford things like that.” Maybe that was in the back of my mind when I called the local stables looking for lessons. Ha ha, Mom.

I’ve tried skiing, scuba diving, and all kinds of sports. None of them seemed a good fit for me. Being short and curvy does not translate to athletic grace. But from the first time I gave the lesson horse a deep massage with the curry and saw him stretch his neck out in pleasure, to the satisfaction of controlling his movements through my own riding, I knew this was it. There was no other activity I had experienced where I loved the prep work as much as the action.

Soon I was riding my trainer’s horse and competing in horse shows in the area. It’s becoming a consuming passion with me. Now I’m looking to buy a horse It’s been two years since Tom’s death, and I finally feel like the fog is lifting.

So, that's Willie. What do you think of her?

Crafting my way to fame

Remember last month when I had extra copies of the original version of Freezer Burn? Yeah, this one. I was wondering what to do with them, and thought maybe I'd give them away or sell them at a discount.

Sheri Fink rode to my rescue and said, "No." (She might have stomped her foot a little, too.) According to her, I was supposed to pair each book up with some kind of amusing trinket, give it a Very Special Autograph, and sell it for more as a... (insert drum roll)...

Limited Edition.

It feels like it's taken me forever, but I've finally got a plan. I had a bunch of really cool martini glasses I bought for a silent auction basket that never happened. They were, like, a dozen for less than $20, so not expensive. I decided to make them candle holders.

So far, this is what they look like. I got the green candles (also cheap, $5 for ten), to represent olives, but I think I'll go back and get red candles instead, because they'll be prettier.

As far as the autograph goes, here's the way I usually sign things. Unfortunately for everyone, I sign it this way even if you're my best buddy in the whole universe and I adore you to pieces. When I sit down to sign the book, my mind goes blank and all I can think of is "Enjoy!" (I do say, "Love, Gayle Carline" instead, because I-love-you-mean-it.)

This is the Very Special Autograph. I'll sign it in red, number each book, date it, and did you see what I did with the exclamation point? It's like a little olive, right? Right?

Never mind. Maybe I could make it green.

My only problem with this plan is that the little glass beads in the martini glasses are not currently attached to anything, so if the glass tips, they roll all over the place. I've already tipped them twice, sending beads across the kitchen table and floor. The dogs ate a few of them because their philosophy is, if it falls on the floor, you gobble first and ask questions later.

Should I glue the beads into the glass? Is there a kind of glue I should use? I could use a crafter's advice right about now.

Oh, yeah, I forgot - what would you pay for a book and a candle? (oooh, maybe I should include a bell, lol) The book orginally retailed for $13.99, although I don't know whether I ever sold any copies at that price. I sold copies for $12. I've probably got $3 invested in each martini/candle.

Do I have an opening bid?

A weekend assignment for my Peeps

I'm on the backstretch, so to speak, of finishing the third Peri mystery. The threads I've unraveled and strewn about the first two-thirds of the book are now being gathered and knitted together. This morning I'm going to do a little recon in my neighborhood so I can write the final showdown as realistically as imagination will allow.

Recently, I made a comment on Jenny Hilborne's post in the Crime Fiction Collective about my books having "roots." There's always a core subject from which the plot and subplots grow. In Freezer Burn, it was about having children and being a mother. Peri's investigation leads her to women who have had children out of wedlock, and she thinks she might be pregnant. In Hit or Missus, it's all about friendships and what we're willing to do for people we love, people we are not related to. In both, I tried to lay down the root without bias. You're free to decide for yourself whether you want to have a child, kill for a friend, etc.

This new book will need a little more editing than the first two, not in terms of line-edits, but in content. As I get closer to the finish, I see more clearly what the book's roots are, and I know I will need to go in and strengthen a few of the scenes. I also know not to do this for at least 3-4 weeks. It's weird, but I know from experience that if I go back and edit too soon, the book gets all muddled, kind of like over-mixing the bread batter.

I've got plenty of other projects to distract me, but I'm missing something from the new book that I already had with the first two: a title.

The working title is Burning Mad, but I don't really like it. Your mission, should you accept it, is to suggest some alternatives. Here are the highlights (no, I don't have a blurb or a logline yet):

1. The main plot revolves around Benny Needles' house burning (almost) down. There is, of course, a body discovered. Benny hires Peri to investigate why his house burned, why someone was in his house, and why the insurance company won't pay up and people are suing him for wrongful death.

2. The root of the story is about families and how we survive them. The Debussy family is having problems with their son, Benny is refusing to talk about his dad, Peri is trying to locate her missing brother, and a lot of the main plot is caught up in the families who built the insurance company.

3. I like short, unique titles, preferably with a mischievous play on words. You know me.

I've been playing with words like smoke, fire, burning, insure, indemnity, loss, premium, coverage, family, heir, tree...

Any ideas here? Throw a girl a bone. Please.

On your mark, get set...

Hop on over to Amazon and get your free copies of my books. Yes, all of them! Today only!

Here's the link to my Amazon page. You can download them and read them on your computer, you can download a Kindle App to your latest toy, so there's no excuse not to get them.

I'm taking a trip to Carmel to celebrate my anniversary with my hubby. (And if you're thinking of coming by to rob us while we're gone, I'm sorry, but our son is home from college this weekend.)

Ferocious, yes?

Enjoy.

It's almost here

Freezer Burn is almost back in circulation. I've re-edited, re-covered, and am in process of re-doing all my website information. I do wish it could all happen at the same time, but Kindle and Createspace don't exactly synchronize their watches.

You take what you can get.

I did, however, update my book trailer. It still makes me laugh.

Freezer Burn will be available for sale soon, very soon, for $2.99 on Kindle and $13.99 in paperback. Stay tuned, Peeps.

A fractionated Friday the 13th

This is a quick post with different parts, which is why it's fractionated and not fractious, which believe me, it could be.

First, here's the new cover for Freezer Burn. It should be available in e-book and paperback within the next couple of weeks. Trust me, I'll be letting you all know when it is.

When Freezer Burn was first released, I loved the cover, and truly had a hard time thinking of anything else when I set my cover designer, Joe Felipe, to work on it. But I trust Joe, and he did a great job. The dark cover with that swoosh of red makes the bold image of the fridge stand out, and I like the stark white lettering of the title. I also like the fridge door open a little, as if to beckon you in to see what you might find. Oh - and the martini glass? It's become Peri's signature - she likes clean houses and dirty martinis. The whole thing is very similar to Hit or Missus and really helps me brand my Peri Minneopa Mysteries.

Now I gotta get that third one finished and quit telling myself, gee, if you write 1,000 words a day you'll be done within the month. Good plan, but which 1,000 words?

Secondly, before I go off to write those words, my son entered a song in a contest held by this very popular interactive webcomic, Homestuck. I've never looked at the comic, as I fear I might be hunted down and terminated for not being cool or young enough to read it. But apparently, because it is so interactive and incredibly fan-based, they hold contests for people to submit songs that serve as a soundtrack to the comic and its characters. If you win and get a song on one of their albums, you get bragging rights (while retaining your song's rights), plus something like 6/100 of a cent in royalties per sale.

Marcus entered, won, and has a song floating out there for the listening. Here's the YouTube posting of the song:



If you're interested in the album, here's where you go to purchase it for $8: Homestuck ColoUrs and mayhem.

Now, excuse me, I've got some writing to do.

Who can I turn to?

Why, all y'all, of course. Remember when I had to pick a cover for Hit or Missus and I was feeling woefully indecisive and lacked confidence? Who helped me? You did. You gave me your opinions and I ended up picking a killer cover.

Now I've got to pick a new cover for Freezer Burn, because I'm re-releasing it myself. It's harder this time than the last, because I've got the old cover stuck in my head. I loved my old cover, but not only do I think I don't get the rights to use that, but I want my covers to look like they go together. I want a "brand." And as much as I love my old cover, people tend to gravitate toward the Hit or Missus cover, so clearly the public has an opinion.

After working with my cover designer, whom I adore, I've got four choices. I suppose I could just put a voting poll at the side, but I never get any votes when I do that. All people ever do is leave comments, either here or on Facebook. So take a look and tell me what you think.

COVER 1:

COVER 2:

COVER 3:

COVER 4:

I'm actually partial to one of these, but I won't tell you which. Instead, you pick one and tell me why.

Do not adjust your TV*

*For you young'uns, this was a line from the TV show "Outer Limits", which claimed to take over your TV set for an hour every week. If I could only have that power...

What I mean to say is "Calm down everyone. Everything's fine."

You may notice, to the right of the page, there is something missing. Freezer Burn is no longer advertised. If you go to Amazon, or Barnes and Noble, you will not be able to order it in e-book form. It looks like it's still available in paperback, but I think you may only be able to get it from third-party vendors before too long.

It's okay.

My contract with the publisher for the rights to Freezer Burn ended this summer, so I sent her a little "head's up" email that I planned to take my rights back. Not because I was horribly unhappy and trying to gnaw my foot off to escape, but because I have found, even with all the work I'm doing to promote and market all my books, I just like having the control. It makes it easier. Mostly, I like being able to fiddle with the price and offer freebies and do things that I don't need anyone else's consent to do.

I sent the early email primarily so I could buy up any leftover stock of my books. I figured, if she had cases and cases of my books laying around, I'd need to know now so I could start saving my pennies to purchase them all. She's a busy publisher, and I thought I'd hear from her eventually and we'd work it all out and I might have Freezer Burn republished by the fall.

Imagine my surprise when she sent me a very cordial email, granting my request early. As in, that day. Turns out, she only had 26 copies of my book left, so that was an easy purchase. And just like that, with a snap of the fingers and a letter via email, my rights to Freezer Burn reverted back to me.

This means, instead of working on the third mystery and the Snoopy memoir, and even the horse show mystery, I am frantically digging out my final draft of Freezer Burn, commissioning my cover designer to put something together and trying to get my first book back on the e-shelves.

Stay tuned - I'll definitely keep you all posted. While you're waiting, here's a little craziness for you to watch over and over again.

As Pooh would say, "Think think think."

I've been thinking about this a lot. I've been threatening it. But now I'm going to do it, Dagnabbit.

There's been a lot of discussion on the Amazon boards about e-books and Indie authors. A lot of people seem to think we all write like we've got boxing gloves on and the I.Q. of a stick. Then there are a group of people who are willing to wade through the Amazonian slush pile to find those rare gems of good books written by good writers. In between those two tribes, is a big fat group of Skeptics.

The Skeptics aren't afraid of Indie authors or their books, with one caveat: a low price means low quality. Where I've been swimming around in the pool of people who think 99 cents is a great price, there is a growing contingent of readers who won't touch a 99 cent book because it's like putting a big GARBAGE HERE stamp on the story.

Personally, I'm not convinced that a low price means low quality. I have a hard time, philosophically, in loading a book onto the internet for an infinite length of time and selling it over and over and over, for more than 99 cents. I mean, it's a marathon, right?

My sales of What Would Erma Do? are pretty brisk. I'd like to say it's because WWED is a good book (which I think it is), but I think the real reason is that it has shown up on the Top 20 of Amazon's Humor for Parenting and Families. When people go looking for humor, it's easier to find.

My sales of my mysteries are a little slower. Okay, a lot slower. I still believe in Hit or Missus (as I do Freezer Burn), but the mystery genre is a large ocean. Even when you narrow it down to Women Sleuths, my books are a small drop in the waters. It's harder to climb up the list, and therefore harder to get discovered, no matter what the price.

So, beginning November 1, I am raising the price of Hit or Missus to $2.99, which is the same price as Freezer Burn. If you want it at the 99 cent price, get it this weekend. As they say, move it or lose it.

I'm keeping my humor books at 99 cents, at least until I'm shown a good reason to raise their prices. If you can think of a good reason for me to hike my humor prices, by all means, let me know.

In the meantime, the mysteries are on the rise.

P.S. Please check out the Crime Fiction Collection blog. It's good. Trust me.

Dragging my feet... until I jumped

I did not want to be a self-published author.

In the old days, I saw what self-published authors produced. God love 'em, for all their good intentions, there was a sea of poorly written, badly formatted, cheaply bound dreck out there, all with hideous covers. My dear, departed uncle wrote a few books like that. He was a really good artist, but not such a good writer. I loved him, but couldn't bring myself to buy his books.

Thank you, no. I'll find a real publisher. Which I did, for FREEZER BURN. The book turned out really nice and I'll always be grateful for the experience. But for the next book, I decided I wanted to try something different.

Back when I was slogging my way through the writing of HIT OR MISSUS, I had this idea for a book of my newspaper columns. I wanted to write a kind of memoir around them and talk about how I got the job, the ideas for some of the columns, feedback from readers, etc. I'd call it WHAT WOULD ERMA DO? Referring, of course, to the great lady herself, Erma Bombeck, with whom I share a birthday.

I approached agents and publishers, who all said, "That sounds interesting. The thing is, you're not famous. Call us when you're Dave Barry."

First of all, I'm pretty sure that's identity theft. Second, I don't think my husband wants to be married to Dave.

When I had almost given up, I met up with a friend who is a prolific and very traditionally published writer. She had recently gotten the rights back to some of her titles, so she threw them onto the Kindle for consumption and was selling a lot. I mean, A LOT. Like, in a very short time, she was able to pay bills with her monthly income.

Hmm. Think-think-think. I already had a readership for my columns. My book of columns was a departure from my novel. I've already been published by a legitimate publishing house. What would it hurt to do my column book on my own?

I researched the online tools, hired an artist to do the cover, and threw WHAT WOULD ERMA DO to the masses as a paperback and an e-book.

And just like that, I was self-pubbed.

In the meantime, I finished HIT OR MISSUS and shopped it around. The entire time I was trying to find it a home, my FREEZER BURN readers were tapping me on my cyber-shoulder. "When's the next one coming out?" was their common question. Agents loved my story. They praised the pacing, the dialogue, the characters. However, it wasn't "right" for them at the moment. I knew what this meant. Agents need to sell to the big houses, and the big houses aren't buying midlist authors because they're only interested in The Blockbuster. I'm no idiot. HIT OR MISSUS is a good, solid, midlist mystery.

So, once again, I took the reins in my own hands. It was easier the second time around. I knew how to do pre-promotion work, how to format the book better, etc.

Suddenly, I wasn't just self-pubbed, I was an Indie Author.

As I prepared for the Santa Barbara Writer's Conference, I thought about how far my thinking had come and what it meant to me. There is still a lot of dreck out there, and the hope is that readers will discover the non-dreck, but in the meantime, the indie authors who want to not only succeed in the business but also raise self-publishing out of the mire and into the mainstream must push themselves constantly toward perfection. Our books must be high quality, in both content and form. We must write better than our best work, to show the world that Indie Authors are serious about their craft.

And then I thought about my life. I won't get embarrassingly personal, but I was raised in a very co-dependent home with a closet alcoholic and a family full of people who wanted to be in the middle of my brain at all times. Psychologically, people raised this way spend their lives trying REALLY HARD to appear NORMAL, which means they end up as overachievers.

After that, I worked as an engineer for years, in a field populated by a lot (not all) of men. Our employer made certain our pay was equal and harassment was treated seriously, etc. But there was an understanding about what women could do versus men: the guy sitting next to me could be an aggravating slob and they'd call him assertive. If I did it, I was a bitch.

So I've learned to work harder and smarter, just to be considered equal to those around me. Do I have to continue doing this to convince people my books are as good as the authors at Random House?

Bring it on. I'm not afraid of a little work.

What are you doing here?

Get yourself over to Thea Atkinson's blog today - http://theaatkinson.wordpress.com/2011/05/02/gayle-carline-geecarl-guest-blogs-at-gonzoink

As you can tell in the url, I'm her featured guest, talking about how flash fiction led me to write Freezer Burn. Actually, you could spend the whole day at her blog, running through the flash fiction blogstreak she did in April. Please check her out. She's a very good writer.

Tomorrow, I'm posting a little diddy from another blogger, L. David Hesler. Sooner or later, I'll be posting something about my weekend at the Los Angeles Times Festival of Books. After that, I'll just be making up stuff,as usual.

Oh, PS: Go USA! As Mark Twain said, "I've never wished a man dead, but I've read some obituaries with great pleasure."

She can be taught

To use engineering terminology, when I wrote Freezer Burn, I spent about three months in design, then about four months writing. Most of my design time went into the plot. I was so worried about leaving clues hanging in the breeze and having the wrong person in the room when a bombshell was dropped. If you've read or watched any bad mysteries, you know what I'm talking about.

But the people... the people I knew. Apart from a few notes on their physical characteristics, I knew who they were, what they liked, where they lived. I did end up changing the killer halfway through writing, but basically, all I had to do was take these folks and plop them into the story.

I approached Hit or Missus in the same way, but it turned out completely different, for a number of reasons. One is that I was trying to make the crime uncomplicatedly complex, if that makes sense. Dale's comment, when he read Freezer Burn, was, "Peri needs a harder case to solve." So I wanted it to be clever without needing a Powerpoint presentation to explain it all. After months of thinking and writing and talking to people, my story outline still seemed shaky, but I went ahead, hoping the plot would be pulled out of the writing.

Somewhere in the middle of the book, I was writing a scene and realized it was boring. Peri is investigating, blah-blah-blah. Or maybe I was bored. It doesn't matter why I did it, but I hit Peri in the head with a golf club. At that point, I threw the outline away and went rogue.

The good/bad news was, my seat-o-the-pants writing exposed a fatal flaw: I hadn't really "met" my guest characters. Sure, I knew Peri, Skip, and Blanche. I even brought back Benny, due to popular demand. But the new men and women Peri was meeting were like paper dolls. It took me months to go back and figure these people out.

Months of re-writing. Months of doing what I should have done before I even started plotting. Gah.

I've started the third book (as yet untitled). It has a basic premise: what would happen if I burned down Benny's house? I began the book during NaNoWriMo and learned something very important: I can't write a book during NaNoWriMo. I got about 7500 words written and hit a wall. I needed more research, more confidence, a better idea of who done it and why. After finally writing several rambling essays on the original crime, I began putting the outline together. And yet...

What was I missing? Come on, class, let's say it all together:

Gayle hasn't met her guest stars yet.

So although I'm antsy to start writing the book, I need to go back and put the time into my people. I'm using Michele Scott's worksheet, "Interview With Your Character" to define the folks who'll be helping/sabotaging Peri in this story. Yes, even the dead people. BTW, I highly recommend these worksheets. Michele's a good storyteller who loves to help other writers. She loves horses, too, so naturally we've become friends.

The good news is, once I get all these ducks in a row, the writing will be a snap.

Writers, out there, does this sound familiar to anyone? Or am I doing it all wrong?

All the news, in fits of print

Well, it's a rainy Sunday here in Southern California, even if it is the first day of Spring. No one told El Nino, I guess. Or are we in La Nina this year? I can't ever tell, but those Weather Babies sure are cranky. Maybe they need a nap. All I know is I've got a couple of news items to pass on this morning.

FIRST NEWS TO SHARE:

My delightful friend Marsha Toy Engstrom, who offers wonderful book club tips on her website, Book Club Cheerleader, gave me an award on Friday, that I was supposed to report and pass to some other lucky bloggers, except I've been kind of busy and didn't get it done. So here it is (insert trumpets blaring):


Yes, it is the Memetastic Award. If you didn't know, a "meme" is a catchphrase or concept that spreads rapidly from person to person via the Internet, largely through email, blogs, forums, image boards, social networking sites and instant messaging.

May I just say I should be so lucky to have ANYTHING I do spread rapidly across the Internet. Please. I'm out here shouting as loud I as I can, people.

Now then, the rules of accepting this award are simple:

1. Display the rather interestingly-childlike-in-a-creepy-way graphic. Check.

2. List five things about yourself, four of which must be bold-faced lies. Your readers are to guess which one is the truth by posting a comment on your blog. This will be difficult, since my life is such an open book, but I'll try.

3. Pass this award on to five deserving bloggers. Okay, really, I don't know of anyone who has time to do this on their blog, but I'll give it a go.

* * * * *

Five things about myself, one of which is actually true:

1. Learning to skydive is on my bucket list.

2. When I was 14, I told my mom I was staying the night at my girlfriend's house, and hitched a ride with a bunch of high school girls to go to St. Louis to see The Monkees in concert. My mom found the ticket stub, I was grounded for two weeks, and I'm still deaf from the experience.

3. I can play the accordian.

4. I have two degrees, one in engineering and one in French Literature.

5. My favorite way to spend a Sunday is to get up early, go down to the marina and take the sailboat out for the day.

Okay, Peeps, which one of those is the truth?

Now then, who should I pass this award to? Stop looking away from me, it won't keep me from picking you. Seriously, is this a pyramid scheme or something? Any-whoooo, here are five of my faves. If you're the blogger, you know just what to do with this honor:

1. Adventures N Writing

2. The Lipstick Chronicles

3. Always Coffee

4. Montana For Real

5. Synch-ro-ni-zing

Look them up, Gentle Readers. I think you will be entertained, amused, moved, and most importantly, fans.

SECOND NEWS TO SHARE:

My book trailer for Freezer Burn is featured today (3/20) on Mary Pat's The Hyland Diner. Stop by and leave your comment - it looks like you're supposed to rate it from one (boo-hiss) to five (bravissimo) - of course I'm hoping for fives, but I'd rather have honesty. Honestly.

And Happy Spring to everyone!

Why buy the cow?

If you're a writer and you haven't checked out Scribd.com, do so as soon as your tush hits the chair and you read this blog. Because, of course, the first thing you do when you fire up the laptop is check for a new edition of my blog, right?

Okay, I couldn't type that with a straight face.

Anyway, Scribd is an online resource for posting your writing and gaining a readership. When I first tried it, I wasn't that convinced. I started by posting a few chapters of Hit or Missus, my as-yet-unpublished follow up to Freezer Burn. I thought, well, let's see if I can get anyone's interest, or even critiques of what I've got going. For those of you who are saying, wait, what publisher will want your material after you've published it online?

First of all, I won't put the whole thing on Scribd. Second, if I can show a publisher that I've got this audience anxiously waiting for the end of the story, how is that going to hurt me?

The results were slow at first, and then picked up to a nice, if moderate pace. I find that I have to re-readcast my work every once in awhile to re-generate interest.

The real interest came when I posted a few files of What Would Erma Do? I began with a simple teaser, then posted the first chapter, and finally an excerpt dealing with a topic I had addressed recently. My audience increased immediately to over a thousand reads. It seems like one more way to reach readers via the Internet.

The reason I'm telling you all this is that one of the items I've read is a paper by Jacqui Murray called How to Publish Your Blog on Kindle. Apparently, people give Amazon a link to feed their blogs to a subscription service for the Kindle. Readers can subscribe for a nominal fee.

Pay for a blog? Are they nuts?

I can't honestly figure out why anyone would buy a subscription to what they can get for free, unless, as Jacqui points out, they don't always have access to a computer but do carry a Kindle or an iPad and must have your blog right now. Seems like a pretty flimsy excuse, but she's making a little money off her blog. Not enough to buy the private island with a jet, but a few bucks every month.

You know me - I figured, why not? My blog is now available for the low, low fee of $1.99 a month, delivered to your device automatically. FYI, Amazon set the subscription price. Some blogs are $0.99, some are $1.99, and a few are higher. I don't know how they figure the rate, but I get a cut of it.

I'll let you know how the experiment progresses.

It's a new dawn, it's a new day

Last weekend, I went to the Southern California Writer's Conference in San Diego. I've been to this conference before - as a matter of fact, I've been going to this conference twice a year since Palm Springs in 2005, I believe. I've sung its virtues before. For people who like to write, it's a working conference. For people who have something written for possible publication, it's a chance to meet agents, editors, and publishers. For people who have questions about where their writing should be going, there are people who've been there, done that, and got the t-shirt.

In other words, if you're a writer, any kind of writer, this conference is money well spent.

So this year I went with a head full of questions. My second Peri book is written and where I think it should be for submission. It's out with two agents, who requested it. One agent has had the book for a few months and another for a few weeks. Neither of these is too long for agents, and I could be content to wait for one of them to respond.

And yet, there is a new world out there. Borders' bankruptcy, self-publishing, and the Rise of the E-Book have conspired to set publishing spinning out of the Big Five's orbit. Rumor has it (rumor, people, meaning NOT verified) that Borders owes Penguin books $300 million, of which they might get pennies back on the dollar when the dust has settled. Chances are, Penguin will be able to survive this; however, because their business model was carved in stone during the Jurassic Era, I'm guessing they will cling more tightly to their old, established, revered, inflexible ways of doing business. I foresee them putting more of their money into their established authors and taking less chances on the newbies, or mid-list writers.

And let's talk e-book for a moment. I won't re-hash what Joe Konrath is saying, other than to tell you to go read his blog if you haven't (then come back here). E-books are outselling hard covers. I have a Kindle myself and I love to turn it on and go shopping at 11 o'clock at night. It's impulse buying at its best.

E-books in particular lend themselves to self-publishing, as does Amazon's Createspace, which does a decent job of producing a trade paperback that looks at least as good as my book, Freezer Burn, which was published with a small press.

So I, like many other Writers With Manuscripts, came to the conference wondering which road to go down. Should I wait patiently for the agents' responses? Should I knock at the door of one of the Big Five? Or go with another small press? Is an agent even relevant if I don't want to go to a big house? Or should I just publish the darn thing myself on Createspace/Kindle/Smashwords?

What the conference gave me wasn't answers. What they gave me was a list of things to consider that would help me make the best decision for myself. They assured me that it was no longer One Size Fits All, and that there was no wrong decision.

They also gave me permission to make a choice that might turn out wrong for me. In the old days, if you made one misstep, it was a long road back to redemption. For example, if you self-published ANYTHING in the past, a big publisher would not LOOK at any of your future work. Or, if your first book didn't sell well (even if you were out there hawking it every weekend and twice on Sundays), you'd never get the deal for the second book. If you've heard those rules, ignore them. Nothing's set in stone anymore except one thing:

WRITE THE BEST DAMN BOOK YOU CAN.

As the SCWC showed me this weekend, the sky's the limit once you've done that.

Emitting waves of crazy

INSANITY: Doing the same thing over and over again, and expecting different results. - Albert Einstein

I spend part of every day playing ball in the family room with my dog, Duffy. The routine is, well, routine. I throw the ball down the hallway, he catches it and runs back toward me, then at some point, he starts to chew on the ball. This is a bad sign. I know he will then wedge the ball underneath the coffee table. Having wedged the ball firmly, he paws furiously and whines until I extricate the ball, yell at him about it, and we start the process again.

He knows that pushing the ball under the table will result in not being able to retrieve it. I know that he will push the ball under the table and I'll have to dig it out.

Which one of us is more insane?

I'm only asking these questions because I'm asking myself similar questions about being a writer. What processes do I keep repeating that never worked in the first place?

For example, when I published Freezer Burn, everyone was designing and distributing bookmarks, so I did, too. I handed them out, at signings, book festivals, libraries, you name it. Did they increase my visibility and my sales? I haven't a clue.

And yet, I designed a bookmark for What Would Erma Do. I haven't ordered them yet, because I'm wondering, especially in this digital age, are they worth the paper they're printed on?

Given the fact that there is an estimated 300,000 books being published this year, and not counting the bazillions of books from years past that people are just discovering, I'm wondering how to maximize my exposure without having to post that sex video. (Just joking. REALLY.)

If you're an author, what kinds of things are you doing differently to get people's attention? If you're a reader, what is turning your head in today's market?

Sorry for the delay

I realize I haven't posted for awhile, and I'm awfully sorry about that. I've tried to post a couple of times, but when my thoughts haven't been too scattered to collect into one place, they've been plain old, day-old stale. Here's where they are scattering:

1. Should I make bookmarks for my new book, What Would Erma Do? I could leave them at the library to drum up business, but other than that, is there any other place who would use them? I've handed them out at book festivals, conferences, etc. but having been a recipient of TONS of bookmarks, I can't say I've ever used any of the ones I was given. Perhaps the day of the advertising bookmark is done. Maybe I should hand out pens… or Kindle covers with my cover on them…

2. I need to push the advertising of the new book. I've been hanging back while it got uploaded for Kindle, but now that it's oh-so-nearly complete, I need to prepare to get busy!

3. I need to edit and update my Peri short story and decide what to do with it. I've got a couple of ideas, but I need to actually DO them.

4. My second Peri book is in the hands of two agents. I was flattered to have them request it. One has had it for a couple of months, however. I've contacted her once to see whether she got it, whether it's a no, but haven't gotten a response. Should I contact her one more time and piss her off? The other agent just received it, so she gets more time.

5. Speaking of the second book and agents, should I even be pursuing a contract with a publisher or should I self-pub?

6. Next week, I'm off to a horse show in Burbank, and the following week I'll be at the Southern California Writer's Conference in San Diego. Just in those two weekends, there's a lot to think about, as well as some packing to do.

So until I have something meaningful to tell you, I'll leave you with a lady I love to learn from, Marla Miller. She has a great website on how to market your muse. Oh - and if any of YOU have something meaningful to tell ME, go ahead and spill. I may be scattered, but I'm still listening.